daily scratchpad

(7)
If you have reached to this point you are exceptional. And furthermore you are left wondering what comes next. We don't know. That's the magic of it. You and I do our mutual neuronal processes second by second; minute by minute; hour by hour; day by day; week by week; month by month; year by year...

(6)
So now I need to do some visuals which will please not only Jesus H Christ and The Holy Motherfucking Ghost, but my readers also: Busty Alli! Pussimo Maximo! My impression of this woman is that she is a Muslim who understands that her husband's 'religion' is actually masculine fakery.
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And I must also admit at this point that I feel the feel the need to wrap this up for tonight. Butt first I need to satisfy the primal human sexual need for visual stimulation. See next post.

(5)

Many of you out there are not aware that Sins Against The Holy Ghost are unforgivable. Even Jesus cannot save you once you have sinned against the Holy Mother Fucking Ghost. Really. You can tell Jesus to 'fuck off;' You can even tell God to 'Eat dogshit.' Such sins can be forgiven you, but not sins against The Holy Fucking Ghost (aka The Holy Spirit). So I wondered: Did my blog entry concerning the 'holy motherfucking ghost' offend the Holy MotherFucking Spirit to the extent that that I needed to worry about my eventual salvation? Hmm...
I decided to take it up with THMFG hirself. I dialed 321 on The Brown Telephone and extended the antenna.
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hg: ?
me: I'm wondering whether you read my blog.
hg: !@*^.
me: Were you offended by any of my recent postings?
hg: -
me: So I need not worry that my sins are unforgivable?
hg: +
me: But you are disappointed in me?
hg: +!
me: How can I improve my blog?
hg: +++++
me: More pussy?
hg: ++++++++++++++++!
me: We need to discuss this in the near future.
hg: +++
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(4)
Which brings me to my own current problems concerning religion: the Christian Trinity. As many of you know, I have in my possession the one and only Brown Telephone. I use it to contact the significant figures in Christianity from time to time: WHTZSNM, Jesus, The Holy Ghost, and Lucifer. But recently I used somewhat careless language in references to Jesus and the Holy Ghost. I was drunk at the time. I failed at the time to take into account the possible emotional/egocentric reactions of Jesus and the Holy Ghost. Central to my problem was the question, 'Did they even read my blog?' Did they know? I finally gathered the courage to contact them both tonight as I drank beer. I called Jesus first:
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js: Hello?
me: Does the letter 'H' suggest anything to you?
js: The number '8'?
me: Do you have a middle name?
js: NMN, but I seem to have acquired a middle initial: H.
me: Have you been reading my blog?
js: Is the pope Catholic?
me: Are you offended?
js: Not at all. I kinda like it. And I loved Pie Jesu! 'H me' all you want!
me Thank...! I'm wondering about the Holy Ghost.
js: We don't communicate very well. You'll have to ask him. By the way, I understand He has a message for you. Be prepared for bad news...
me: Uh-oh.
js: Yup.
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(3)
working on beer #6 at 1743. Kootch just walked by my door headed to the potty, smiled and waved. On the way back to her room just now she informed me that she 'will make bean dip tomorrow.' We are (tap) alone now.
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I love it that Obama was raised as a natural child who was not 'indoctrinated into' any particular religion at that young age when we are all intellectually defenseless. I love it! Apparently his mother was an extremely sophisticated young woman who taught him Natural Humanism instead of a particular religion. Did The Jews 'convert' him to 'Honorary Jewdom' while he was still in the neonatal unit? Maybe. We don't know. We hope not.
What brings me to this subject is - of course - Obama's recent references to his choice of Christianity as his personal religion (after having been raised as a nontheist). It struck me immediately, of course, that The Politician Obama chose Christianity-as-religion for political purposes: Christianity is politically correct. No 'nontheist' has achieved high political office in America since the time of The Founding Fathers. Who can blame him?
Certainly not me! I love O'Bama! (I just kissed Kootch 'goodnight' as she caught me returning from the fridge with beer #8.)

(2)
The Today Show has featured its 'Education Nation' theme all this week (educationnation.com). Hmm. This tends to confirm my theory that I live in a world full of idiots. I knew it!

And in a related series of reports, CNN had this interesting quiz on the subject of religious education, while ABC NEWS had this interesting piece on the same subject of religious education. Not to be outdone, CBS NEWS capped it off with this interesting piece on that very same subject of religious education.
It would seem to follow that America is uniformly too ignorant, too religious, and heading too rapidly downhill as a result. Interestingly, the more people knew about the subject of religion, the more likely it was that those same people were Atheists or Agnostics!
I just took this 15 question quiz (from the Pew poll) and scored 100% (but I must admit that I benefited from one wrong answer from a previous poll (the CNN quiz) - the question concerning whether a teacher could quote The Bible for 'literary reasons.'
The more you know about religion, the more likely you are to reject religion. The more you know about science the more likely you are to embrace science. Viva education!

(1)
Kootch and I just finished a 'Millionaire' during which I ate a little food then popped open the first beer. Slight buzz halfway through beer #1. Millionaire is all new and with a new format which tends to make the result more 'dicey' and less talent-based. I liked the older version better, but it was obviously more expensive to produce.
Been playing a lot of C-III recently, as usual. I'm now on game #30 since I began recording the beginning, middle, and ending scenerios. In a recent game Mahatma Ghandi zapped me with Three or four intercontinental nuclear missles! Naughty! Not to mention suprising...
Speaking of 'naughty' I'm wondering whether I'm in trouble with Jesus H Christ and the Holy Fucking Ghost. Hmm. I'll have to check that out later... I'm definitely in trouble with the Jewish god WHTZSNM. Always have been. Always will be.
Buzzing nicely as I near the end of beer #2. Maybe I'd better make a to-do list before my brain goes totally off-line:
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NBC does Education Nation.
CBS checks out our 'religious IQ' (also CNN and ABC).
('Face Rad' as I wrote the above sentence: nasal tissues swelling, mucus and tears flowing. Headed to the fridge for beer #3. I'm back now at 1553.)
Obama's religion.
Don't forget pussy!
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(6)


I just visited the KT/LR for a beer. No beer left. I have drunk all the beer. I therefore poured myself out a shot of whiskey and Diet Pepsi. It is now 2042. Sip. I noticed that - tvwise - I am much more popular than I had thought! Hmm...


Which brings us to tonight's link dump:


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God is Imaginary.


Skeptics Annotated Bible.



Skeptics Annotated Quran.

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(5)
Yes, I know: I'm naughty. Sue me.
I need to document one of my sources concerning information regarding the Islamic god, Allah: The Women's Encylopedia of Myths and Secrets. Awesome book! Page 22:
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Allah
Late Islamic mascularization of the Arabian Goddess, Al-Lat or Al-Llat - the Allatu of the Babylononians - formerly worshipped at the Kaaba in Mecca. It has been shown that 'the Allah of Islam' was a male transformation of the primitive Lunar Deity of Arabia. Her ancient symbol the crescent moon still appears on Islamic flags even though modern Moslems no longer admit any feminine symbolism whatever connected with the wholly patriachal Allah. See Arabia.
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(4)
And concerning (7) below... what can I say? Islam is clearly a male religion. Females are almost held in contempt by male Islamists! In extreme cases females must wear Burkas which cover everything but their eyes, while males can wear whatever the fuck they please. And notice that the Muslim Minarettes (prayer towers) resemble penises. Jew psychologists would call these Muslim Minarettes, 'phallic symbols.' Is Allah queer?
Mohammed was clearly heterosexual, having had thirteen wives. This suggests that Allah Himself was basically heterosexual. So what explains the ancient Muslim antipathy toward the female? I think I know: Allah was originally a female god named Al-lat who morphed into a male god (prove me wrong if you can). It must have been a sexual revolution. It must have been obvious to the ancients that the female was the doorway through which they all entered existence; but males were physically stronger than females. These two verities struggled for the ancient imagination, godwise. Al-lat prevailed in the beginning, but Allah eventually overthrew Al-lat when the tribal males saved the culture from external attack. It was a case of cultural evolution: All gods became male by virtue of massive muscularity: Males saved communities, therefore gods must be males. But there remained a significant number of 'female godists' who pointed out that the female vulva was the gateway. A sexual war ensued. The males eventually won.
This idea is reflected in Judeo-Christianity by the fact that the Jewish god WHTZSNM is a male, and that His Son Jesus H Christ is also a male. But The Female was obviously essential: Jesus therefore emerged from the female Mary who, having been impregnated by the Holy Fucking Ghost, brought Jesus to term and gave Him birth (the vulvic details of which are not recorded).

(3)
I just now tried to revive that little music box. Apparently the gears are giving out and it stops even when wound up. And I just noticed that there is, in fact, no dancer on top, but three little mice sitting in three little teacups. Rats. It plays a note about every several seconds... Barf.
Working on beer 8... Kootch recently noted disgustedly that it was 'made in China.'
Concerning the electronic timer mentioned in (4) and (5) below, it is still working beautifully. It is a vast improvement over the mechanical timers which always failed after several months of use. Furthermore, this timer can be irritating! it beeps. The mechanical timers rang out when time was up, but this sucker beeps. You cannot ignore this timer. If you ignore it, it begins to beep faster. If you still ignore it, (heavy face rad - sneezing, tearing, huge mucus flows -> LR...
I'm back a minute or two later, snuffing up mucus and swallowing (thump) it as necessary.)
If you still ignore it, it beeps even faster! Finally, if you continue to ignore it, it becomes quiet and counts up instead of down so that you can determine exactly how long you have been... 'unfocused.' Highly recommended.

(2)
Every time I stand up and head to the 'fridge for a beer my nose begins to run. This has been going on for quite some time. At first I thought it was caused by a gas that was somewhat lighter than air. But later observations suggested a more refined theory: microwave radiation originating in the apartment above. I have pretty much confirmed that theory. Even now, as I type this, my entire face is throbbing and my nasal mucosa is slightly swollen, oozing mucus. Sniff, sniff. I am being zapped (tap) by Hanya Hirself!
A little research revealed that Hanya - with the face of a devil - was actually a beautiful woman who had become consumed by jealousy. As a result her face changed from female to male and she grew horns. Did Kootch know this? I doubted it. I asked her about Hanya. She said it was a Shinto god who (shielded) a home from evil. (Somewhat like Christian crosses and statues, etc.) I told her the 'jealous female' story and she was surprised, saying that she had no knowlege of (Hanya history) except that it was some Japanese god who kept evil away. She further remarked that her Hanya face was (wickedly handsome), and that was why she hung it on the wall. She was right about that. It was. Turned out that it came into her hands during a visit to Japan. Her younger brother had been a popular singer and his fans occasionally presented him with small gifts. After he died, (tap) those artifacts spread through the remaining family members and she selected several, among them Hanya, a music box with a dancer on top of it, and two Daruma dolls, one of whom is staring at me even as I type this. The music box played a beautiful version of 'Love Makes the World Go 'Round, but I cannot find an appropriate link just now.

(1)
First sip at 1430 (5 minutes ago). Disgustingly sober. Sip. Been trying to figure out what happened with (6) below (thump). I suspect sabotage (tap) by Gerash Trash (AKA Local Jewish Dog Shit). I'm pretty sure I posted something there but I was already fairly drunk, so I can't be certain. Oh well. Comes with the territory.
I think last week's meltdown was another example of drinking beer while dehydrated, so today I took the precaution of eating lunch. That should slow the process if inebriation somewhat. I may actually have to resort to drinking water! Oh horrors... Last sip at 1452. I'm off to the 'fridge...
Very slight buzz beginning at 1456. Sip.
I do remember doing a fair amount of searching on You Tube for Pie Jesu and would probably have linked to it. I like this version best, having seen it on TV some time ago. Even several days later, this music was still 'running around in my head.' So use caution!
Began beer #3 at about 1530. Buzzing appropriately.

(8)

Time for me to sign out. I love you. Do Acid if you can. Remember me.

(7)

Ok. I have figured it out somewhat. I need to wrap this up since I am literally drunk as a skunk as I begin my last Diet Pepsi and Canadian Mist. Sip.
It dawns on me, of course, that I have completely failed to address the question posed in last week's blog: Islam.
My impression, reading the above link, is that Islam consists of 'rules.'
That is to say that 'human creativity' is verboten. Islam is a fixed system of social behavior based on The quoran. New ideas are verboten! Islam wants you to behave predictably. There is no room in Islam for new ideas! Allah feels most relaxed when He isn't bothered by 'new human ideas' as He goes about His daily appreciation of the results of His most recent inspections of male butts, which have been raised in His honor. Allah loves to inspect billions of male butts several times every fucking day!
Allah loves butts! Male butts!
Furthermore, Allah hates 'pantie lines.'
Allah therefore refuses to inspect female butts: Muslim females can therefore wear naughty underpants. Allah will not notice.

(?)

(5)

Beer gone. We are about to diverge. Sipping Canadian Mist and Diet Pepsi.

I recently bought some stuff from a local Wall Mart: a mechanical timer and an electronic timer. I also bought a package of cotton panties, size 11. (beeping)

(Unable to locate my beeper. It beeped for about three minutes, then went silent. After searching I am forced to admit that I have lost control of the current situation. Nighty-night.)

(4)
Buzzing really, really well at 1618L! I am feeling quite satisfied at having come up with a plausible theory concerning recent interactions with neighbors and local law enforcement. Sip. Halfway through beer #10. Yum. I am such a fucking genius!
I need to wrap this up before I become totally non compos mentos:
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Doctor Oz blows it. This is based on a fragment of a Dr Oz show I saw a day or two ago wherein Dr Oz discusses 'swelling.' He failed to point out that differential swelling in the legs was an emergency DVT situation. Doctor Dumbass. BTW, I recommend to my sedentary friends that they purchase an electronic timer from Wall Mart. Set the timer to 15 minutes. After 15 minutes the timer will begin beeping. Get up and tend to that obnoxious timer over there on your mattress! This will minimize the possibility that you will develop a DVT. Do it! Love that beep!
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Just now as I went to the fridge for beer #11 I witnessed Michael Moore on CNN. Wolf Blitzer was interviewing MM concerning his possible replacement of the ineffectual Jewish Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel, who may intend to run for mayor of Chicago. Michael Moore says that, if nominated, he will accept!!! I love it!!! Note to The Prez: Do it! Do it! Do it! (let the dumbass Jew run for mayor of Chicago!)
Working on beer #12 (Beep-beep. Beep-beep...) My electronomic timer just went off, signaling to me that I need to get up off my fat ass and walk around. I did it. So obnoxious! I then reset that electronic timer for another 20 minutes. I recommend such an electronic timer to all you sedentary old folks out there who habitually sit on your collective fat asses and do computer stuff.

(3)
I think that the ACSD has been 'tracking me' for many years, based on the 'fact' that I am 'A known Devil Worshiper.' Eheh. I must have a very long file after all these years! How does the ACSD Intelligence Division 'know' that I am a fucking 'Devil Worshiper?' Sheeit!
Kootch.
Kootch, my beloved wife, is the most 'non-religious' person I know. After our (Catholic) marriage - after she had 'converted' to Catholicism - she showed no interest at all in 'my' religion. I accepted that with no problem, given that my personal experiences with Catholic priests and nuns had demonstrated to my satisfaction that those people were in no possible way, 'holy.' I stopped going to church. My attitude was that, 'if Kootch was going to hell we would go to hell together.' I later discovered Philosophy at the local library. Philosophy totally destroyed my 'religion.' Goody, goody, goody! Anyway...
Some time after we moved to our current location, Kootch suddenly developed an interest in the Japanese (Shinto) god, Hanya. One ugly muthafucka! She hung a facial representation of Hanya on our hallway wall where it would be seen immediately by any dumbass ACSD cop who was allowed to enter our apartment. I thought at the time that her taste in gods was as dumb as her decorative sensibility. But it was her home and I was only a tenant. I became 'used to' that dumbass 'god' hanging on the wall over the years.
But then came the first occasion where we allowed the ACSD to enter our apartment. The cop saw 'The Devil' hanging on our hallway wall. He reported it to 'The ACSD Intelligence Division.' We were labeled immediately by ACSDID as 'possible Devil Worshipers.'
Walter L Gerash celebrated: he could proceed with his stalking agenda unencumbered by local law enforcement.

(2)
I've been mulling over my recent encounter with the dumbass ACSD, and I've concluded that the encounter was a well-prepared 'scenerio,' featuring pre-selected 'actors:' Me, Dumb, Dumber, Good Samaritan, and Polish Maniac. (End of beer #4 - off to the 'fridge...) My cogitations over several days (on and off) yielded the following theory:
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Dumb and Dumber were selected to respond if and when I ever 'fell into the trap' and called the ACSD. The ACSD woman who took my call may have been 'in on it' in some sense. It was essentially a 'good cop - bad cop scenerio' wherein Polish Maniac was 'bad cop' and Good Samaritan was 'good cop,' the two dumbass cops being simply two dumbass cops who may have been 'preped' for their roles in the 'play' somehow. The scenerio was complex, hence the time required to bring all the actors together was unusually long.
The fact that the cops talked to 'Maniac' first suggests that either the woman or at least one of the cops (or all three) were 'in on' some part of the scenerio. This theory also explains the Polish Maniac's long loud oration from his balcony above: It was needed to 'explain' Good Samaritan's 'intervention:' He 'heard the Polish Maniac' ranting loudly and tried to 'calm the situation down,' simultaneously ingratiating himself with me. We talked. I said that I would mention him on my blog. He said that he was familiar with blogging, having written a blog but not having made an entry in 'five months.' I told him that 'after this was all over' I would give him the address of my blog. He seemed mildly interested, fellow blogger that he was... but something wasn't quite kosher, and so later I informed him that giving him my blog address 'might be a bit premature.' He accepted that without any apparent regret.
But first he talked with Dumb and Dumber.
And then Dumber asked me whether I had ever had a 'mental health evaluation.' Hmm...
Conjecture: both Maniac and GS 'testified' to the dumbass ACSD cops that I... (unknown) and therefore the two dumbass ACSD cops believed (unknown) and reported the result to ACSD 'Intelligence Division' where (unknown) was entered on my ACSD file by yet another dumbss ACSD cop.

(1)
First sip at 1200 noon. Gotta do a little research...
Beginning beer #2 at 1247. No buzz yet. Got a rittle rink dump for ya:
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Mario Viera is now unofficially Jewish... having been circumcised on the eighth day while in intensive care. A lawyer has been notified... Congratulations to MSNBC for even mentioning this story yesterday on one of their afternoon shows. Rare that this pernicious mutilation is ever mentioned on a Jew-dominated American news media!
One-liners on Circumcision, from The Intactivism Pages.
(Slight buzz now at 1305.)
The Mormons have been 'Mormonizing the Judeo-Christian dead' for some time, now. Fight back. Atheize the Dead. Do it to The Mormons! That'll teach 'em.
Thoughts on Transhumanism and Living Forever (from Skepchick). Interesting, but to me, 'living forever' is an oxymoron. I much prefer the expression, 'Eternal Life.'
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End of Rink Dump. Buzzing nicely as I gulp down the remnants of beer #3. First sip of beer #4 at 1330.

(7)
I dialed 123 on the Brown Telephone. Jesus answered immediately:
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me: 'Burning the Quran.' Do you have an opinion on that?
js: I love it. It's a new dance... right? I'm really into dancing as I approach the planet Hell.
me: Not a new dance. It's a new idea.
js: Ah! I love new ideas. Please elucidate.
me: A Christian Pastor in Florida is threatening to Burn the Quran.
js: Must be a very, very sexy dance. Right? I'm studying male dancing moves as I approach Hell. Gonna get me a rotsa pussy in Hell! Soon! Oooo-oooo-weee! Wait and see!
me: It's a 'new religion.' They worship a new god called, Allah.
js: You sound serious. Does Daddy know about this?
me: Yep.
js: How many people?
me: Billions and billions.
js: Uh-oh. I need to do some research. Call me back later?
me: Will do...
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(6)
Time to wrap this up.
Beethoven Violin Romance. He didn't want to saddle her with his approaching deafness, so he 'broke it off' and composed a violin piece in their honor. So sad.
Glorious Gusset! Yum!
Butt first I need to contact Jesus. I dialed 666 on the Brown Telephone:
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gd: Hello?
me Oops. I meant to dial Jesus' number.
gd: Drunk again.
me: Yup.
gd: You are so despicable.
me So are you. Can we call it 'even?'
gd: (hangs up)
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(5)
Buzzing beautifully! Working on beer 10. Time for a Rink Dump:
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The Dolly Lama Donates to brain research. I love it! Buddhism is what I call 'the psychological religion.' This donation demonstrates that The Dolly appreciates that. Viva La Dolly! I'm still waiting for the results of a Personal LSD Trip by The Dolly Himself... in His own words... We shall see... Maybe... Hmm?
Is The Grand Design Within Our Grasp? Very, very esoteric stuff here... By that I mean, 'Mucho Fucking Science/Logic!' It might take you years to understand this L-Brain question, but it will take you only a few LSD Trips for you to understand the much more personally important R-brain verity:
No dead person has ever benefitted from LSD.
'Drop it! Drop it! Drop it while you can!
Do it; do it; do it!
Now!

(4)
Whew! By the way, I wanted to thank the person who had returned my 'stuff' to the ACSD. The cop had given me a building number and an apartment number. I went to King Soopers and purchased some 'presents:' one can of mixed nuts; one can of pralines, and one can of roasted pecans. I intended to give the person a 'thank you' choice between those yummies or a 20 dollar bill (or both! WTF!). I searched for that address for about 40 minutes or so that same day. No joy. I concluded that the cop had lied to me concerning the address. 'Typical,' I thought. I told Kootch that it was 'all hers.' I figured she would take them to Japan in the spring of 2011, my usual contribution to her yearly 'presents from America.' But today I handed the job off to Kootch: 'Find her if you can. I can't.'
Kootch found her! How? I'm embarrassed by the simplicity of her procedure: she looked at the map of our local area, then went right to the building and the apt number! The young lady was gratified to receive our belated acknowlegement of her civic duty! I - dumbass that I am - had simply driven around the area searching for that building number and had not found it! I had even gone to a similar number presuming an error by the ACSD officer. I knocked on the door. A dog answered my knock with a bark. I replied in kind. Then a totally gorgeous little girl opened the door. She must have been about 7-8 years old. I said, 'Are you B?' 'No,' she said. I said, 'Does anybody named 'B' live here? 'No,' said she, smiling broadly. I thanked her and left.
When Kootch returned empty-handed I knew immediately that she had 'connected.' 'You found it!? How?'
'I looked at the map.' she said.
Oops.

(3)
The 'lead cop' was quite impressive: tall, handsome, well dressed... I said something like, 'Don't worry, I'm not gonna shoot ya!' as I stepped back and motioned for them to 'come on in.' (I had noticed that the raving maniac above had failed to invite them into his apartment but had chosen instead to talk to them in the hallway. There was a good reason for that, hence I invited them into our apartment, the idea being to show these two outstanding gentlemen that I had nothing to hide whereas the raving maniac above had something to hide given that he had not invited them in to his apartment.) I figured they would immediately see the differences between me and the raving maniac above. Wrong. The cops' last names turned out to be, 'Dumb' and Dummer.' They were, in other words, typical ACSD cops. I told them that I had specifically requested that they contact me first before contacting the maniac above. Why had they contacted the maniac above before contacting me? 'Communication error' explained one of the cops (this exact phrase was used by the woman who took my call when I called her back to complain that the cops had contacted the maniac before they had contacted me). I concluded immediately that it was no accidental 'communication error' that led the cops to contact the maniac above before contacting me: I was being lied to all 'round: the cops knew all about me; what they were really interested in was 'them.'
I explained the problems: Cigarrette butts dropped for the last two months or so. Stomping above me. Loud music. They were the tennants from hell. 'Dumb' explained that the Baggie of butts was butt 'an allegation' which proved nothing. I showed them my current log, sitting on the kitchen counter. I said that I had been recording 'incidents' for many years. 'Dumber' said that keeping such a log for so many years was really dumb.
At that point they made it clear that they were not interested in my 'stalker problems' and left. I saw them soon after, talking with 'Good Samaritan.' I went down to talk to them all. I requested 'cards' from each of the cops. I thanked GS again. One cop handed me a single card. 'Dumber' then asked me: 'Have you ever been evaluated for mental health problems?' (The maniac had called me 'crazy' and had informed the cops of his diagnosis. The diagnosis had obviously impressed Dumber.)
I answered, 'Do you think I'm crazy?'
'No,' said the dumbass cop.
'Then why ask me such a stupid question?' said I.
The dumbass cop had no reply. My conjecture is that his intention was to 'sow doubt' about my 'sanity' in the mind of GS, who obviously favored me during the entire confrontation.
The cops left.
There have been no cig butts on the patio since that day, last Saturday afternoon.
This is progress!

(2)
Just popped open beer 5. This is taking too long, but I gotta wrap it up.
A woman answered. Businesslike. Stern. I briefly explained that I had a 'neighbor problem' and requested ACSD assistance. Her first concern was the address of that neighbor. Then she wanted to know my address. It was a bit odd that she wanted to know the address of the neighbor before she knew my address, but then I remembered 'caller ID' and that the ACSD must certainly have 'caller ID' installed. Then she asked me for my address and telephone number. I gave her the information, neglecting to include the area code (tap), figuring that she had all that information right in front of her. She then asked for my area code. I thought, 'Uh-oh. This bitch is lying to me.' I then gave her the area code. I then said to her that I did not want the officers to go to the 'neighbor's' address before they had talked with me first. She acknowleged my request. I hung up. The ranting continued above for another 15 minutes or so. I waited for the cops to arrive.
An hour later I called her back. She explained that they were 'extremely busy' but that she had dispatched an officer '5-minutes ago.' I waited another 10-15 minutes, then noticed an ACSD car just below our patio. I waited, looking through the peephole. No cops. After a few minutes I open the door and heard a conversation going on above me. I walked part way up the stairs. Two cops were talking to the ranting, raving maniac in the upper hallway. At the sight of me he recoiled, complaining to the cops that I was coming up the stairs. I retreated to our apt and waited for the cops to knock. After some time there was a knock on the door. I checked the peephole. The cop was standing about 45 degrees away from 'straight-on.' (ACSD cops, I have noticed over the years, avoid standing right in front of the door, probably fearing a shotgun blast through the door by an irate 'customer.' Can't say I blame them given their typical performance. Eheh.)
I opened the door

(1)
I'm about 75% through beer 3 at the moment (sip). Been reading last week's blog entries. Fun. I continue to be astonished by the difference between reading those entries while sober, and while 'drunk' (thump above). I suppose that part of the reason is that I go into more detail as I read the links, and that the remaining part is that I am emotionally 'in the same place' as when I wrote it. (That's why I suggest that you read this blog after acquiring a slight booze buzz.)
I was so impressed with last week's encounter with the ACSD officer who returned 'my stuff' to me! It actually restored my faith in the ACSD, and so, as I stared down at the patio floor several days ago, I noticed not only the usual cigarette butts, but two matches as well. Matches?! That was a 'first.' Symbolic Escalation? I thought so. I called Kootch out to the patio as I collected the butts and the matches and put them into the small plastic baggie with the other butts collected over the last several months. Then we noticed 'them' on the patio above us.
I got their attention by telling them that we did not appreciate them dropping their cig butts on our patio, and showed them the baggie full of cig butts. One of them then engaged me in 'conversation' during which we expressed our mutual contempt for each other. Turned out they were 'brothers.' They admitted dropping the cig butts but also insisted that they 'used an ashtray.' I pushed the young bastards 'buttons' a little. A kind of 'meltdown' followed, as the 'spokesperson' began speaking to me in Polish (probably cursing). His voice rose. He seemed to be speaking to the entire neighborhood in a very loud voice. It was quite funny, and I laughed at him. Kootch and I went inside, but could still hear him. So I got my voice recorder and began recording his mindless ranting. I informed him that I was recording him. About that time a neighbor appeared on the grass below us and began trying to calm the situation down. I showed him the baggie of butts as I explained the cause of the problem. The neighbor seemed to sympathize with me as he attempted to calm the outraged orator down a bit. I thanked him for his friendly intervention. After about 5 minutes of recording the ranting from above I got bored and reentered the apartment and turned off the recorder. I had better things to do. But the mindless ranting continued, the neighbor meanwhile attempting to calm the LOUD bastard down. I decided that this was a good time to call the ACSD: violence might well result from this situation. I was not worried personally because I had a loaded .357 Magnum at my disposal, but I felt some concern for the neighbor. I should have dialed 911, but - like an idiot - I dialed the ACSD number taped to a kitchen cabinet door. Bad idea.

(6)
Been peeing in my pants as I wrote the most recent posts. Fun. Warm fun. Last sip at 2143. Pants cooling off now... Goodnight.

(4)
You were never 'born.' You will never 'die.' You are eternal: No beginning. No end. Enjoy your life NOW! There is no other life. There is no other Universe.
Working on beer #11. Sip. Kootch has hit the sack. We are alone. (thump above)
It is only 2020 as I write this. Gonna be a short night.
Last beer at 2040.
Sip.
My last instinct before hitting the sack is to favor you all with some beauty (tap!) in the form of poetic and visual links. Hmm. Poetic first: Omar Khayyam:
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Some for the glories of this world and some
Sigh for the prophet's paradise to come
Ah take the cash and let the credit go
Nor heed the rumbles of a distant drum
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Message? Now!

(4)
1822 and I am working on beer #9... aborted!

'History' has always bored me, even my own. So I just put that 'open beer' in the fridge and poured myself a double shot of Canadian Mist and Diet Pepsi. I live in the moment. Do you live In The Moment? No? Shame on you.

'The Moment' is a Buddhist idea (I think - being gassed here). The expression means that the subject (you) is not thinking about personal history or possible personal future, but is instead focused on The Eternal Now, which is to say, The Moment.

I first learned about 'The Moment' while reading books by 'Osho' (otherwise known as Bhagwan Shri Rajneesh) back in the late '80s - early '90s. I decided to try 'living in the moment.' I found the perfect tool for that, women's panties: It was almost impossible for me to forget that I was wearing women's underpants! so I simply remembered that 'I was alive in the moment' whenever I felt those lovely sensations below the belt. Wow! What a reminder!
Think about it this way:
The universe has existed for 13.7 billion years. Long time. You don't remember.
After you die, The Universe will continue to exist for many more billions of years. Another long fucking time. You won't remember.
Furthermore: you did not remember your birth. Do you think you will remember your death?
Probably not.
Only Now remains. Nothing else remains. Live now. Enjoy your eternal life!

(3)
I just 'corrected' (4) below by adding the phrase, 'extended the antenna.' For those of you who don't know, 'extending the antenna' means 'extending the middle finger' of my right hand while folding all other fingers into a ball. (A 'flip-off,' in effect.) (Stomps above.) The extended finger serves as the antenna for the Brown Telephone, which I hold in my left hand while talking. The actual Brown Telephone is invisible - only I can see it - but the 'antenna' is highly visible to whomever might be looking. (Kootch once caught me talking to god in the LR, and thought that I was 'flipping her off.')
Which brings me to the point of this 'correction:'
I recently had the opportunity to 'extend the antenna' to two of the young faggots who play loud music above and otherwise 'perform' for the Jewish stalker Gerash. The 'encounter' was their choice, not mine: yesterday after shopping at KSS (for beer among other essentials) I had parked Kootch's Toyota and was walking toward the east entrance. The two (butthole buddies?) were prominently on the patio upstairs. I stared at them as I approached, 25 pounds of rice in my left arm, antenna arm free. One of them waved. I waved back at them with 'antenna extended,' making several small circles with my right hand. It was an unmistakable gesture of contempt to which they did not seem to react. I then said, 'How are you idiots doin' up there?' One of them replied, 'We're doing fine. How are you?' 'Excellent!' said I, and proceeded to deliver the (Kootch-bought) bag of rice to a waiting Kootch.
My interpretation of that scenerio is that 'they' were watching me (as usual) and displayed themselves on the patio in order to stress me and see how I would react. I reacted appropriately with belligerence, and they reacted inappropriately with phoney civility.
Notice the methodology. It helps to know that the previous day I was gassed so much that my throat was swollen (tap) to the point where it was difficult to speak, and (tap) as a result I had 'threatened' them with my loaded 357. The threats worked, apparently, and both yesterday and today have been relatively gas-free... except for the times when I watched Michael Douglas (faint boom) interviews on TV concerning his stage 4 throat cancer. I was gassed with 'R-burning' on those occasions.
Gerash 'tells the truth' symbolically only. Never verbally. (faint boom) I suppose it's a 'lawyer thing' in that symbols are much more subject to interpretation than words are.
I, on the other hand, tell the truth both ways.

(2)
Such a pleasure to randomly encounter good people!
Working on beer #5 at 1541. Better do the Rink Dump:
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Really, Really Kosher Sex. This is one of the most bizarre Jewish views of 'sex in America' I have ever encountered.
Even in Israel, 'Kosher' is preferred by religious dilettantes who ride public transportation. Stuh-raaaange...
30 best blogs to learn about Marijuana. 'Fess up, folks: You really wanna know. Do it! Then move onward and upward to LSD!
America makes desparate attempt to cut loose the Iraq albatross, which was hung on us all by The dumbest, most simple-minded fucking Texas idiot ever elected. Rotsa ruck on that one...
African Bishop preaches that circumcised and uncircumcised men are equal in the eyes of god. Is punished by being circumcised. That'll teach the dumbass!

(1)
About halfway through beer #2 just now, there was a knock on our door. Kootch met me as I approached the hallway. She whispered, 'There's a cop knocking on our door.' I checked the peephole: sure enough. I slid the mechanical latch back, unlocked the digital lock, removed the chain-stop, then opened the door. Yes? said I. The cop held up a small plastic bag. It contained my driver's license. My first thought was that the cop was delivering a newer version. 'To what do I owe this honor?' said I. '(Somebody) found this on the Highline Canal Trail,' said the cop, and handed me the bag. A closer inspection revealed a few other cards. Then I made the connection: I had done a bike ride (boom above - another boom) about 90 minutes ago and had fallen off the bike as I attempted a tight U-turn at Broadway. The cards had obviously fallen out of my shirt pocket, unnoticed. I aborted the ride and headed home (thump on the floor above me). I thanked the cop and shook his hand. Rare occasion! (Another floor thump above.) ACSD 'greetings' are usually bad news for me! (Very loud bangs above me as Gerash goes apeshit for some reason. Kootch asked me if I was making the noise just now - her 'hearing' is not very good - and I advised her that the faggots upstairs often did stuff like this as I wrote my blog.)
So... another 'Good Samaritan! Kootch and I will Thank that good person.