Friday, March 22, 2013

 

The Meaning of Life.

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All of which brings up the question: 'If there really is no God, and The Universe burst into existence 13.8 billion years ago for reasons unknown, what should I do on Friday or Saturday or Sunday?' Let's pretend that you have been granted an interview with Mother Nature. You ask Her: 'What should I do?'
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A: Enjoy.
Q: But that is not enough. I am something. What am I?
A: You are a biological machine. Mostly Oxygen.
Q: What happens to me after I die?
A: Nothing. 'You' disassemble into your original chemical components.
Q: But what about my Soul?
A: 'Soul' is an ancient myth. You have no soul.
Q: But dying terrifies me.
A: It's only natural. Death is a very natural thing. Why not enjoy it?
Q: But I fear nonexistence! It seems horrible!
A: There is no such thing as 'nonexistence.' You have Eternal Life.
Q: Huh?
A: Time, like orgasm, is a quality of life. 'Time' is otherwise meaningless.
Q: Huh?
A: No Time, no Life. No life, no time. Therefore your life is eternal. You have eternal life.
Q: How?
A: Think 'Existential connectedness.' One cannot exist without the other.
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Beautiful Essays. Sip.

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We need to transition from ugly to beauty. Almost anything will work in that regard, but I think you will appreciate the following links (tap) (!), which I have been researching recently:
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Volcano Lightening. I saw this on TV recently.
(Holy?) Grail Maps the Moon's Gravity.
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Plus the following Marijuana links. But first, I need to remind you that the human brain evolved successfully because it 'worked quite well.' 'Survival' was the ultimate criterion. Brains that did not work well, died. Prematurely. Eventually, the Pragmatic Brain evolved to such a level that it could appreciate 'higher functions' beyond mere survival. It discovered Beauty. Excess neurons must have been responsible for that glorious addition, and, apparently, 'beauty' turned out to have 'survival value!' I wonder how ancient humans came to experience beauty. I suspect that Mother Nature saw that the 'time was right' and so She provided needed chemical components in the form of plants like Marijuana. Ancient humans must have noticed that when certain plants burned 'en mass,' they inhaled the smoke and experienced amazing effects. They liked it! They began growing and smoking those plants. Ganja was born. Mother Nature did not stop at Marijuana, of course. She provided many other 'living things' which, when 'consumed,' tended to enhance animal experiences of 'Beauty.' This leads me to believe that 'Beauty' was a necessary evolutionary experience leading to Modernity. Interestingly, if you do not believe in 'Mother Nature' you must attribute God Himself as the creator of those various naughty plants. (Michael Moore is on TV just now. I love Michael Moore! Kootch and I are currently watching his movie, Capitalism: A Love Story.) And we all know that the Jewish god was not at all naughty. Right? Not at all. Not. At. All. Read The Bible.
Here are the links:
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Marijuana Uses. After reading a definitive sample of these essays I can attest to their individual beauty. Highly recommended! They are well worth reading. You will love them.

 

Bat Shit Looney.

(2)
Now that all the 'heavy stuff' is out of the way I find myself half drunk with no new subject to write about. Hmm. Lemmee think... Aha. Got it: Walter Gerash himself understands that Technology has overtaken Mythology in this age of Modernity. Gerash is not a Clueless Jew: Gerash does not pray for me. Not at all.
Instead, Gerash zaps me using modern technology. Why? Because Walter Gerash understands that 'Prayer doesn't work. Technology works.' Gerash is a Jewish Pragmatist. So Gerash zaps me with microwave cannons. Beats the hell out of prayer any day.
I imagine that if Gerash ever visited Israel he would go to the 'Wailing wall.'  He would bash his head against the wall (notice the font change). Once. (Once is enough. Do it twice and you end up in the local psychiatric clinic with all those 'Jerusalem Syndrome' idiots.)
Butt I digress.
And indeed the subject of Walter L Gerash is so... ugly, that enough is enough.
 

Waaay Too Fucking Holy.

(1)
Sipping on beer #2 at 1500. Sip. Not a lot of sleep last night but maybe I can get this blog done anyway. Sip. Time to reread last week... Yep, it's always more fun when I'm buzzed.
The big news this week is that the prez is in the 'Holy Land' walking the political tightrope and doing quite well so far. A Palestinian Homeland and a possible war with Iran appear to be the major issues. I agree with The Prez that The Palestinians deserve a 'viable state.' Regarding a possible pre-emptive war with Iran vis their (just opened beer #4 at 1536) nuclear enrichment processes and possible nuclear bomb program, I agree with Joe Klien: 'Containment' is the best solution.' The 'Cold War' with the now defunct Soviet Union demonstrated that quite well (Thank you Gorby!), and our recent very expensive wars in Iraq and Afghanistan do not allow for yet another expensive war with Iran. Sip. (Being zapped with microwave radiation as I write this; frequent 'nose blows' dispose of the excessive mucus.) We need to realize that the 'Middle East' is waaaay too fucking 'holy.' The solution lies in Cultural Enlightenment, not war. 'Cultural Enlightenment' means the abandonment of Ancient Mythologies in favor of Modern Science. We need to understand that we are all in this together. We need to understand that Technology has abolished Mythology as a viable methodology!
Sipping on beer #5 at 1603. Sip. Going downhill fast. Sip.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

 

I am so hungry!

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Sipping on beer #11 at 2230. Sip. Hongry! I'm gonna sign out. Goodnight.
 

Every Word is True.

(4)
Sip. Now what? Aha. Tonight's Music: Don't Cry for Me Argentina!
Hmm. (Is your 2014 schedule maxed out yet, Andre? Wouldn't you like to do Buenos Aires? Yes you would! I know you!)
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Now what? Sipping on beer #10 at 2200. Sip.
At the supermarket today I must have been in an obvious good mood. I don't usually talk to strangers, but today I 'accosted' an old (like me) lady, saying to her, 'Shouldn't you be watching TV? We have a new pope!' She responded appropriately and I went on my way. After I got home I crashed due to sleeplesness.
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What is 'Holy?' Isn't privacy 'holy?' No? Really? I don't believe that.
 

Testicular Inspection?

(3)
As the recent cogitations in Rome concerning the next pope proceeded, I wondered about a little known allegation which I read in The Woman's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets: There was once a female pope named, Joan. She had 'scammed her way into the Papacy' somehow. She was stoned to death when her sexual scam was discovered.
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'Whether Pope Joan really existed or not, a curious Vatican custom arose in the wake of her legend. Candidates for the papacy had to seat themselves naked on an open stool, to be viewed through a hole in the floor by cardinals below. The committee had to make its official announcement: 'Testiculos habet et bene pedentes.' ('He has testicles and they hang alright.') It seemed important that 'Holy Mother Church' must never be governed by a 'Holy Mother.'
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Quoted, of course, from my edition of TWEMS. Question: Did the new pope actually have to undergo this 'inspection?'
 

Did the Seagull poop?

(2)
You know me. When I saw the news on CNN I began wondering how this unexpected development might affect American life. Will it spell the end of The Republican party? Will the new Pope condemn 'crimes against children' thus suggesting that infant sexual mutilation is an abomination? (American Latinos tend to be Democrat and sexually unmutilated.)
We wonder.
But I had, as usual, slept a fitful night full of microwave radiation. Not enough sleep. Was it enough to blog? The answer turned out to be 'No.' So after returning from a shopping trip to the local super market and sipping a beer with Kootch while we watched TV, I took a nap. They left me alone for the first 40 minutes or so, but then began zapping me with heavy microwave radiation. The pulse rate was about the usual 10 pps, and the pulse length was about 80 ms. I eventually caved in and got out of bed. They were right! That nap was enough!
Sipping on beer #5 at 1948. Sip.
I predict that Religion will soon discover Entheogenic Drugs. The Entheogenic Age will begin! Will Benedict really do LSD? Will he then issue a 'secret report' concerning the religious efficacy of LSD? And if so, how many Cardinals will try that new approach to religion? And how many will simply remain 'Jewish?'
(At the risk of repeating myself, LSD is an extremely 'spiritual experience.)' You must try it.)
Lastly, I'm wondering about the question posed in the title of this post.
 

Holy Shmoke! Pope Francis!?

(1)
Sipping on beer #4 at 1835. Sip. I was planning to do this blog on Friday, but the election of the new pope today was too much to resist. I like the choice!
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1. He chose a new 'pope name.' That signals 'change.'
2. He is a Jesuit. (Jesuits taught me in HS. They're smart.)
3. He is a chemist. (Huh?! You can understand Chemistry and still believe ancient Jewish Mythology? Huh? How is that possible? Has he been crediting God with his survival of a serious lung disease instead of modern medicine? If so, it suggests that, like everybody else, he is not exactly anxious to 'go to Heaven,' and is 'ruled' by emotion more than by logic.)
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Whatever. I really like this choice. And notice that although he is from Argentina, he is the son of Italian Immigrants: a compromise based on genetic confluence. Sip.


Friday, March 01, 2013

 

Me: Sip.

(4)
Sipping on beer #11  at 1921. Sip.
(The rest of the post made absolutely no sense when I reread it just now, and so I have deleted it.)
 

The Ultimate Realization.

(3)
(Listening just now to CNN I heard the expression, 'A Jedi Mind Meld.' Eheh. The 'Mind Meld' is actually a Vulcan technique. The speaker (Obama) is confusing 'Star Wars' with 'Star Trek'! Huh?! So where were we? Acid? Acid! Sip.)
So here is the situation:
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The Ex-Pope experienced absolutely no increased 'communication with God' after he was voted in as Pope. He tried, of course: he prayed, 'O my God, I am now Pope. I expect that we now at last have a direct auditory connection. Over.'
No answer.
The new Pope tried over and over again for many years: 'Over.' 'Over!' 'Over?' No answer. The Pope became convinced that communication with God was not possible because there was no God; therefore his 'Papacy' was really a fallacy. At last, He decided to abandon ancient ways of doing things. He stumbled upon my blog. He was horrified at first, but began 'warming up' as time went by. He began to understand 'philosophical scepticisim' as he read my blog. He eventually became an Atheist. He then resigned his position as the ultimate Catholic Leader. He decided to do LSD before he ceased to exist. He wanted to understand Ultimate Reality.
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Six more beers...

(2)
Well folks, the previous post consumed six beers, and we are now at the decision point concerning whether or not to continue drinking beer. We could continue writing... but there is an open beer sitting within reach even as I type this. And I have to do some more research. Lessee... Sip.
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That ends tonight's experiment, folks. Surprise, surprise! Sip. Eheh.
The Ex-Pope will reside at Castel Gandolfo. I noticed in a recent news video of that beautiful location that there seemed to be at least one 'observatory-type' telescopic installation. A bit of research just now (sip) revealed that The Vatican Observatory is located there. Aha! Will the Popus Emirentis take up Astronomy as a new hobby? Why not? I predict that He will indeed visit that famous obvervatory. I predict furthermore that Popus Eximus will insist on viewing Jupiter as his very first astronomical view. I predict that his only comment on viewing that famous astronomical object will be, 'Galileo was right! OMG!'
And since I am engaged in speculation at this point, I speculate that his next request will be Acid. Really! He will insist on doing a Classic Acid Trip before he dies. His wish in that regard will be granted by elements of the Swiss Guard, who have 'connections' with 'Modern Swiss Chemistry.' Eheh.
Sip.

 

'The whole business went to the Italians!'

(1)
I'm back after another two weeks off. Sip. Two weeks between 'booze nights' is definitely much healthier than only one week. Lessee, 12 beers max in two weeks could allow for weekly booze nights if booze is limited to six beers per booze night. Hmm. I'll consider stopping at six beers tonight as a test. We'll see how that goes. Time to reread last posts... Yep. Sipping on beer #2 at 1520. Will I want to stop after beer #6?  Huh? Is The Pope Jewish?
Now for some links:
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Powerful video shows relief for Cannabis Patient. Very convincing.
History of LSD. Interesting.
5 Reasons to use Hallucinogens. I like this woman! 
Cosmos on HULU. One of my all-time favorites. Carl Sagan did Pot, and maybe Acid.
Mozart Clarinet Concerto in A. Second movement. (Tonight's Music.)
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Sipping on beer #4 at 1556. Sip. Buzzing nicely. The Pope is looking less and less Jewish in spite of that little cap (yarmulke). Yep, The Pope is definitely 90% Catholic, 10% Jewish at 1605. Sip. Sip. Sip.
And the big news this week is that the Pope has resigned for age-related reasons. I don't blame him one bit. Old Age is debilitating. Sip. And there is now no Pope! Sip. Hmm!
The Italians must be... concerned. The recent trend has been... unfortunate. Will The Italians lose control of The Papacy? Horrors! And concerning that interesting possibility, folks, I would like to submit that 'Italians' have recently 'devolved' on an 'average earthly social basis' because of a certain Supreme Court Justice who thinks that 'corporations' are 'people!' 
(Yeesh. What will they think up next?)
(And now I must confess that the title of this post was taken from one of 'Bhagwan's observations' regarding the history of Judeo-Christianity.)  

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