Friday, November 27, 2009
Where Else?!
(5)
Needless to say I was surprised by that information.
----------
me: You must mean 'thirteen hundred.'
lu: Thirteen thousand.
me: Deny the request.
lu: Done.
me: Are you familiar with Galileo?
lu: He is one of our favorite celebrities. Why do you ask?
me: I have reason to postulate that he may have invented the Brown Telephone.
lu: Correct! I am impressed! What led you to this idea?
me: Seems they recently found the bones of his middle finger.
lu: The antenna finger! Of course! He misses it, I can tell you that. He feels permanently bereft. Do you mind if I convey the good news?
me: Not at all. So Galileo is in Hell?
lu: (laughing) Where else?!
----------
Needless to say I was surprised by that information.
----------
me: You must mean 'thirteen hundred.'
lu: Thirteen thousand.
me: Deny the request.
lu: Done.
me: Are you familiar with Galileo?
lu: He is one of our favorite celebrities. Why do you ask?
me: I have reason to postulate that he may have invented the Brown Telephone.
lu: Correct! I am impressed! What led you to this idea?
me: Seems they recently found the bones of his middle finger.
lu: The antenna finger! Of course! He misses it, I can tell you that. He feels permanently bereft. Do you mind if I convey the good news?
me: Not at all. So Galileo is in Hell?
lu: (laughing) Where else?!
----------
The Middle Finger
(4)
Whew. This brings us to something I discovered only recently, the possible origin of The Brown Telephone. I absolutely love this story concerning certain bodily relics of Galileo. As I read it a bell rang: Galileo's middle finger?! OMG! Why would anybody want to steal Galileo's middle finger from his corpse?! Did Galileo use it as an antenna? Is that why? Was his middle finger some sort of a local icon back in those days? I immediately dialed Lucifer's number in search of background information:
----------
lu: Hello?
me: My feedback indicates that your choice of panty styles was well received. Congratulations.
lu: Thank you.
me: She really loved the pink satin.
lu: Noted.
me: She wants more white cottons, plus more pink satin. Blue doesn't interest Her.
lu: Noted. White background is best.
me: Right. And cotton is most absorbent. She likes absorbent.
lu: Noted. In fact, She has placed a large order for six hundred and sixty six pairs of white cotton size 13 JMS panties. She has charged your credit card thirteen thousand one hundred and thirty two dollars. Do you approve the transaction?
----------
Whew. This brings us to something I discovered only recently, the possible origin of The Brown Telephone. I absolutely love this story concerning certain bodily relics of Galileo. As I read it a bell rang: Galileo's middle finger?! OMG! Why would anybody want to steal Galileo's middle finger from his corpse?! Did Galileo use it as an antenna? Is that why? Was his middle finger some sort of a local icon back in those days? I immediately dialed Lucifer's number in search of background information:
----------
lu: Hello?
me: My feedback indicates that your choice of panty styles was well received. Congratulations.
lu: Thank you.
me: She really loved the pink satin.
lu: Noted.
me: She wants more white cottons, plus more pink satin. Blue doesn't interest Her.
lu: Noted. White background is best.
me: Right. And cotton is most absorbent. She likes absorbent.
lu: Noted. In fact, She has placed a large order for six hundred and sixty six pairs of white cotton size 13 JMS panties. She has charged your credit card thirteen thousand one hundred and thirty two dollars. Do you approve the transaction?
----------
The Rape of the Penis
(3)
On a more serious note, I was entranced by the most recent threat to infants as divined by American news media this week, dangerous cribs. Aghast, I decided to look up the problem using Google. Good news, folks! This important information for parents was inspired by an investigation by kidsindanger, a child advocacy group:
'To date, 16 children have died in cribs of similar faulty design. And portable cribs are just one of the myriad children's products that may prove to be dangerous.'
Good news, folks. This is a relatively small number of infant deaths. We need much more reporting of that caliber, folks. Really. Much more. Much, much, much, much, much, much, much, much fucking more. Really.
Take, for example, a lesser known problem: American Genital Cosmetic and Theraputic Surgery on Male Infant Genitalia as Psychological Benefit to Mutilated Americans, Especially Male Parents, Jews, and Muslims, and other Circumcised Americans, not to mention the economic benefit to the Medical Community and the International Foreskin Industry.
Question: How many infant deaths can be ascribed to this grotesque American mutilation per year? And beyond that, how many 'iatrogenic' (harmful) outcomes can be ascribed to this grotesque 'surgery?'
Well... I claim that every circumcision is 'iatrogenic.' But what do the experts say?
The website noharmm suggests that American infants are literally being raped by the Jew-dominated American Health Care Establishment, (buttressed by the Jew-dominated American Media which refuses to address this horrible national affliction).
On a more serious note, I was entranced by the most recent threat to infants as divined by American news media this week, dangerous cribs. Aghast, I decided to look up the problem using Google. Good news, folks! This important information for parents was inspired by an investigation by kidsindanger, a child advocacy group:
'To date, 16 children have died in cribs of similar faulty design. And portable cribs are just one of the myriad children's products that may prove to be dangerous.'
Good news, folks. This is a relatively small number of infant deaths. We need much more reporting of that caliber, folks. Really. Much more. Much, much, much, much, much, much, much, much fucking more. Really.
Take, for example, a lesser known problem: American Genital Cosmetic and Theraputic Surgery on Male Infant Genitalia as Psychological Benefit to Mutilated Americans, Especially Male Parents, Jews, and Muslims, and other Circumcised Americans, not to mention the economic benefit to the Medical Community and the International Foreskin Industry.
Question: How many infant deaths can be ascribed to this grotesque American mutilation per year? And beyond that, how many 'iatrogenic' (harmful) outcomes can be ascribed to this grotesque 'surgery?'
Well... I claim that every circumcision is 'iatrogenic.' But what do the experts say?
The website noharmm suggests that American infants are literally being raped by the Jew-dominated American Health Care Establishment, (buttressed by the Jew-dominated American Media which refuses to address this horrible national affliction).
Green Onion News Reports
(2)
Green Onion News. Patrick Kennedy has claimed that his Catholic Bishop, Thomas J Tobin, Instructed him to 'stop taking communion' three years ago. Kennedy stated that he honored the bishop's request, but that he felt spiritually deprived soon after quitting that weekly Catholic ritual, and fell into a deep depression. Jewish psychiatry, failing at 'talk therapy,' suggested drugs; however Mr. Kennedy was disinclined to experiment with possibly dangerous mind-altering prescription drugs. Instead, he consulted 'an old Hippie who lived just down the street.'
'Best decision I ever made!' said Kennedy, who's praise for the old Hippie was effusive in the extreme. 'No more little crackers for me, baby! They do nothin'!' When asked what the Old Hippie suggested as a substitute, Kennedy replied, 'Acid, baby! You wanna see God? Do Acid! Forget those dumbass little crackers! I'm off them suckers for good. Cold Turkey, baby. Acid is the cure! We need to legalize that stuff...' The interview went on for several minutes as the obviously manic Kennedy praised the effects of the well known illegal drug. (By the way, Chris Mathews did a scathing interview with the offending bishop in a recent Hardball interview. Green Onion News totally enjoyed it.)
----------
In other news, President Obama is due to present his plan to 'finish the job in Afghanistan' next week sometime. Onion News, the parent network to Green Onion News, has two reports:
Possible options in Afghanistan.
Heroin addicts pressure Prez to stay the course.
Don't say we didn't warn ya.
Green Onion News. Patrick Kennedy has claimed that his Catholic Bishop, Thomas J Tobin, Instructed him to 'stop taking communion' three years ago. Kennedy stated that he honored the bishop's request, but that he felt spiritually deprived soon after quitting that weekly Catholic ritual, and fell into a deep depression. Jewish psychiatry, failing at 'talk therapy,' suggested drugs; however Mr. Kennedy was disinclined to experiment with possibly dangerous mind-altering prescription drugs. Instead, he consulted 'an old Hippie who lived just down the street.'
'Best decision I ever made!' said Kennedy, who's praise for the old Hippie was effusive in the extreme. 'No more little crackers for me, baby! They do nothin'!' When asked what the Old Hippie suggested as a substitute, Kennedy replied, 'Acid, baby! You wanna see God? Do Acid! Forget those dumbass little crackers! I'm off them suckers for good. Cold Turkey, baby. Acid is the cure! We need to legalize that stuff...' The interview went on for several minutes as the obviously manic Kennedy praised the effects of the well known illegal drug. (By the way, Chris Mathews did a scathing interview with the offending bishop in a recent Hardball interview. Green Onion News totally enjoyed it.)
----------
In other news, President Obama is due to present his plan to 'finish the job in Afghanistan' next week sometime. Onion News, the parent network to Green Onion News, has two reports:
Possible options in Afghanistan.
Heroin addicts pressure Prez to stay the course.
Don't say we didn't warn ya.
Happy Thanksgiving!
(1)
Happy Thanksgiving! Kootch enjoyed this one a bit more than usual because I did some of the cooking. I volunteered for the job after we decided to do a pork roast this year instead of a turkey. I even did some of the veggies - sliced onion with asparagus spears: Using a Wok on max heat, sautee the sliced onions in a small amount of crushed garlic and Canola oil (to give the onions a head start); add sliced asparagus and a tablespoon or so of water for steam, tossing the mixture constantly. Add other seasoning and more water as necessary until done to taste. Crunchy is best. Kootch did the mashed potatoes and made the gravy and some fried 'kabotcha.' Store-bought giant bisquits rounded out the dinner. Water mellon for dessert. Yum. Leftovers tonight.
Tonight's subject list:
----------
1) Hardball grills bishop over wafer privileges. Kennedy denied Communion, does Acid instead.
2) Crib Deaths vs Circumcision Deaths. American 'news' media goes ape shit. Again.
3) Obama to 'finish job' in Afghanistan. Israelis celebrate. India celebrates. World news media celebrates.
4) The origin of the Brown Telephone.
----------
Tonight's music: Mozart piano concerto 23.
First movement.
Second movement.
Third movement.
Happy Thanksgiving! Kootch enjoyed this one a bit more than usual because I did some of the cooking. I volunteered for the job after we decided to do a pork roast this year instead of a turkey. I even did some of the veggies - sliced onion with asparagus spears: Using a Wok on max heat, sautee the sliced onions in a small amount of crushed garlic and Canola oil (to give the onions a head start); add sliced asparagus and a tablespoon or so of water for steam, tossing the mixture constantly. Add other seasoning and more water as necessary until done to taste. Crunchy is best. Kootch did the mashed potatoes and made the gravy and some fried 'kabotcha.' Store-bought giant bisquits rounded out the dinner. Water mellon for dessert. Yum. Leftovers tonight.
Tonight's subject list:
----------
1) Hardball grills bishop over wafer privileges. Kennedy denied Communion, does Acid instead.
2) Crib Deaths vs Circumcision Deaths. American 'news' media goes ape shit. Again.
3) Obama to 'finish job' in Afghanistan. Israelis celebrate. India celebrates. World news media celebrates.
4) The origin of the Brown Telephone.
----------
Tonight's music: Mozart piano concerto 23.
First movement.
Second movement.
Third movement.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Worry Not
(6)
me: I have limited resources in that regard. Please explain the facts to Her.
js: Just kidding. You're very gullible. I like you.
me: So how goes 'The Restoration Project?'
js: Awesome! I have reduced my (static) by 30 percent already! My (static) is becoming moist and sensitive again and I love it. And all because of you.
me: Aw, shucks...
js: I am committed to you forever. Worry not!
me: I have limited resources in that regard. Please explain the facts to Her.
js: Just kidding. You're very gullible. I like you.
me: So how goes 'The Restoration Project?'
js: Awesome! I have reduced my (static) by 30 percent already! My (static) is becoming moist and sensitive again and I love it. And all because of you.
me: Aw, shucks...
js: I am committed to you forever. Worry not!
Uh-Oh...
(5)
I dialed 123 on the Brown Telephone. Jesus answered immediately.
----------
js: Hello?
me: Me again. Any good news? Please... Help me... Please...
js: She loved them. She got right to work on the whites.
me Whew.
js: Her first production was the image of a toasted cheese sandwich. She is very proud of that result.
me: I'll bet.
js: She plans to auction it eventualy.
me: Goodoner! Should bring a handsome sum.
js: She wears the pink pair 24/7.
me: Obviously. So would I.
js: She loves the feeling of the rear gusset line and the feeling of the elastic leg openings.
me: Me too. OMG!
js: She wants more.
me: No problem.
js: She wants your credit card number.
----------
I dialed 123 on the Brown Telephone. Jesus answered immediately.
----------
js: Hello?
me: Me again. Any good news? Please... Help me... Please...
js: She loved them. She got right to work on the whites.
me Whew.
js: Her first production was the image of a toasted cheese sandwich. She is very proud of that result.
me: I'll bet.
js: She plans to auction it eventualy.
me: Goodoner! Should bring a handsome sum.
js: She wears the pink pair 24/7.
me: Obviously. So would I.
js: She loves the feeling of the rear gusset line and the feeling of the elastic leg openings.
me: Me too. OMG!
js: She wants more.
me: No problem.
js: She wants your credit card number.
----------
The Satin Road
(4)
(Interestingly, I have been able to detect no radiation for the last 30-45 minutes.)
(Oops. IRFS from 203 @1906L. Oh Well...)
I could go on and on, of course with my Test Dummy Analysis, but my point has obviously been made. Time to address ideas which correspond to my current state of mind: my fear of the Virgin Mary. Is she serious? I called Lucifer:
----------
lu: Hello?
me: Me again. Any news concerning Marian Underpants?
lu: Delivered on schedule. Relax. You worry way too much.
me: I forgot to designate 'color' and 'style.'
lu: I took responsibility: Three blue, three white, all cotton.
me: And?
lu: One pair of pink satin.
me: She'll love that!
lu: I know, I know. In fact, we have named our Reverse Einstein Loophole, 'The Satin Road' in honor of that shipment.
me: Way cool! Any preliminary feedback?
lu: You need to contact Jesus.
me: You giant!
----------
(Interestingly, I have been able to detect no radiation for the last 30-45 minutes.)
(Oops. IRFS from 203 @1906L. Oh Well...)
I could go on and on, of course with my Test Dummy Analysis, but my point has obviously been made. Time to address ideas which correspond to my current state of mind: my fear of the Virgin Mary. Is she serious? I called Lucifer:
----------
lu: Hello?
me: Me again. Any news concerning Marian Underpants?
lu: Delivered on schedule. Relax. You worry way too much.
me: I forgot to designate 'color' and 'style.'
lu: I took responsibility: Three blue, three white, all cotton.
me: And?
lu: One pair of pink satin.
me: She'll love that!
lu: I know, I know. In fact, we have named our Reverse Einstein Loophole, 'The Satin Road' in honor of that shipment.
me: Way cool! Any preliminary feedback?
lu: You need to contact Jesus.
me: You giant!
----------
Radiation Test Dummy Report
(3)
Which brings us to my latest Radiation Test Dummy Report: Attention Dr Oz.
Although radiation from cell phones is not detectable by the human nervous system because of low power, such radiation can be detected by the nervous system when that power is increased by several orders of magnitude. I experience such effects frequently - almost continuously - except when I am away from our apartment. Interestingly, the effects seem to vary according to the particular body structures involved. But in addition to that, the effects vary according to the 'quality' of the radiation involved. The ultimate perceived effects are therefore the result of two variables: 'Body Location,' and 'Radiation Quality.'
By 'radiation quality' I mean four things: 1) Frequency. 2) Intensity. 3) Direction. 4) Number of sources.
Heat is the most obvious example, given our familiarity with microwave ovens, but this effect is actually the very last effect to be noticed. Body temperature is a very slow variable.
The first noticable effects of high density RFR are the skin effects. Nerves in the skin fire in response to RFR. Apparently, this nerve reaction is based on the electro-chemical nature of the nervous system, which responds to electromagnetic stimulation. Nerves 'fire' in the presence electric stimulation.
Pain nerves respond with 'sting signals.'
Motor nerves respond by activating muscles, causing muscles to twitch, or activate.
Sensory (touch) nerves detect muscle twitching.
Thus, for example, SCRS (Skin Crawling Radiation, Scrotum) is the result of sensory nerves in the scrotum detecting the movement of tiny scrotal muscle contractions resulting from activation by external stimuli, specifically, RFR.
Another common symptom is IRFS (Itching Radiation Face and Scalp). Apparently there are a multitude of 'itch sensors' on the face and scalp, especially the scalp. These specialized sensory nerves fire in the presense of RFR of a certain 'quality.' I often experience the sensation of six to eight square inches of my scalp 'reporting' high density itching sensations while I lay in bed at night. This effect is very 'directional' with the result that the direction from which the radiation originated is obvious. Facial itching as a result of radiation, on the other hand, tends to be intense but 'pinpoint,' although such radiation retains general directional information.
Which brings us to my latest Radiation Test Dummy Report: Attention Dr Oz.
Although radiation from cell phones is not detectable by the human nervous system because of low power, such radiation can be detected by the nervous system when that power is increased by several orders of magnitude. I experience such effects frequently - almost continuously - except when I am away from our apartment. Interestingly, the effects seem to vary according to the particular body structures involved. But in addition to that, the effects vary according to the 'quality' of the radiation involved. The ultimate perceived effects are therefore the result of two variables: 'Body Location,' and 'Radiation Quality.'
By 'radiation quality' I mean four things: 1) Frequency. 2) Intensity. 3) Direction. 4) Number of sources.
Heat is the most obvious example, given our familiarity with microwave ovens, but this effect is actually the very last effect to be noticed. Body temperature is a very slow variable.
The first noticable effects of high density RFR are the skin effects. Nerves in the skin fire in response to RFR. Apparently, this nerve reaction is based on the electro-chemical nature of the nervous system, which responds to electromagnetic stimulation. Nerves 'fire' in the presence electric stimulation.
Pain nerves respond with 'sting signals.'
Motor nerves respond by activating muscles, causing muscles to twitch, or activate.
Sensory (touch) nerves detect muscle twitching.
Thus, for example, SCRS (Skin Crawling Radiation, Scrotum) is the result of sensory nerves in the scrotum detecting the movement of tiny scrotal muscle contractions resulting from activation by external stimuli, specifically, RFR.
Another common symptom is IRFS (Itching Radiation Face and Scalp). Apparently there are a multitude of 'itch sensors' on the face and scalp, especially the scalp. These specialized sensory nerves fire in the presense of RFR of a certain 'quality.' I often experience the sensation of six to eight square inches of my scalp 'reporting' high density itching sensations while I lay in bed at night. This effect is very 'directional' with the result that the direction from which the radiation originated is obvious. Facial itching as a result of radiation, on the other hand, tends to be intense but 'pinpoint,' although such radiation retains general directional information.
More on RFR
(2)
Keep up the good work, Doctor Oz. The longer you avoid addressing the 'elephant in the room,' the more powerful I become.
Before leaving the subject of RFR or EMR and the dangers thereof, I need to list a few related/interesting links I discovered recently:
Raygun Dreadnaughts Will Rule the Oceans by 2019. Or in other words, 'How to shoot down incoming missles with your weaponized microwave oven.'
Pain-ray Heater Towers?! Or, 'How to Keep Your Tomatoes Warm on Cold Nights.' Eheh. I can verify this principle from personal experience, folks: when I am being irradiated by weaponized microwave ovens from above and below as sub-freezing air is being blown into my bedroom by two floor fans stacked in the window next to me, I must sometimes pull the covers down to my waist for up to 30 minutes or so to keep my 'tomatoes' from getting too hot! Whew.
A heat-Ray Rifle? Sounds like a fascinating way zap your neighbor. (tap)
And for those of you who want more than just 'webstuff,' here is an actual 'book' written for beginners who want to fry other people. The title is, 'The Poor Man's Ray Gun (Deadly Rays),' by David Gunn. I actually bought it, and here is my review:
Essentially this is an over-priced 24 page piece of shit. It is little more than a pamphlet. Virtually worthless. Amazon sells it for $11.95 plus shipping. Do not waste your good money on this piece of shit.
Keep up the good work, Doctor Oz. The longer you avoid addressing the 'elephant in the room,' the more powerful I become.
Before leaving the subject of RFR or EMR and the dangers thereof, I need to list a few related/interesting links I discovered recently:
Raygun Dreadnaughts Will Rule the Oceans by 2019. Or in other words, 'How to shoot down incoming missles with your weaponized microwave oven.'
Pain-ray Heater Towers?! Or, 'How to Keep Your Tomatoes Warm on Cold Nights.' Eheh. I can verify this principle from personal experience, folks: when I am being irradiated by weaponized microwave ovens from above and below as sub-freezing air is being blown into my bedroom by two floor fans stacked in the window next to me, I must sometimes pull the covers down to my waist for up to 30 minutes or so to keep my 'tomatoes' from getting too hot! Whew.
A heat-Ray Rifle? Sounds like a fascinating way zap your neighbor. (tap)
And for those of you who want more than just 'webstuff,' here is an actual 'book' written for beginners who want to fry other people. The title is, 'The Poor Man's Ray Gun (Deadly Rays),' by David Gunn. I actually bought it, and here is my review:
Essentially this is an over-priced 24 page piece of shit. It is little more than a pamphlet. Virtually worthless. Amazon sells it for $11.95 plus shipping. Do not waste your good money on this piece of shit.
Two Thumbs Down
(1)
Mozart Piano Concerto #1: Good background music as you read the blog and links. And the soloist is a yum-yum! Mozart was eleven years old when he wrote this and apparently had a little help from daddy.
Movement one.
Movement two.
Movement three.
Been an interesting week as I began a new game of C-III over the weekend and am now at the beginning of the Industrial Age, building railroads and factories. Also been doing a lot of Drench, and web surfing. And then there's TiVo: lots of interesting stuff to watch, some of which gets deleted before I can get around to it. But I keep up to date with my favorites, of course, for example, Doctor Oz. Yes, folks, he's at it again, trying to cure our sexual ills without mentioning male sexual mutilation (circumcision). Indeed, in the most recent sex show (on the anatomy of sex) he has diagrams of everything male and female except for the head of the penis which he avoids showing to us by obscuring it with a label reading, 'penis.' Eheh. His body also blocked that part of the diagram much of the time. Got a good laugh out of that one.
Another recent show dealt with one of my favorite subjects, electromagnetic radiation. Seems cell phones can be hazardous to your health if used excessively. We all know about the dangers of driving while talking on our cell phones (thus diverting much-needed brain power away from the task of operating a dangerous vehicle). Right? But that wasn't part of the program. Doctor Oz wanted to make you aware of a much lesser, risk: Radio Frequency Radiation from your cell phone's antenna. It may cause brain cancer in a small number of individuals over a period of 30-40 years or so. Darn. Everybody in the audience was scared shitless, of course, right on cue. My favorite part of the show was the 'testimony' of a female expert on 'cancer causing toxins,' Dr. Devra Davis (a nice Jewish lady, of course). Doctor Devra was not as expert on electromagnetism as she may have been on chemistry, because she muddled her explanation of why the danger was greatest when the signal was weakest. Made no sense at all to me, and I'm an 'expert.' Do some cell phones increase power output in areas where the incoming signal is weak? If so, that might clarify her muddled explanation. To summarize this week's Dr. Oz shows: two thumbs down.
Mozart Piano Concerto #1: Good background music as you read the blog and links. And the soloist is a yum-yum! Mozart was eleven years old when he wrote this and apparently had a little help from daddy.
Movement one.
Movement two.
Movement three.
Been an interesting week as I began a new game of C-III over the weekend and am now at the beginning of the Industrial Age, building railroads and factories. Also been doing a lot of Drench, and web surfing. And then there's TiVo: lots of interesting stuff to watch, some of which gets deleted before I can get around to it. But I keep up to date with my favorites, of course, for example, Doctor Oz. Yes, folks, he's at it again, trying to cure our sexual ills without mentioning male sexual mutilation (circumcision). Indeed, in the most recent sex show (on the anatomy of sex) he has diagrams of everything male and female except for the head of the penis which he avoids showing to us by obscuring it with a label reading, 'penis.' Eheh. His body also blocked that part of the diagram much of the time. Got a good laugh out of that one.
Another recent show dealt with one of my favorite subjects, electromagnetic radiation. Seems cell phones can be hazardous to your health if used excessively. We all know about the dangers of driving while talking on our cell phones (thus diverting much-needed brain power away from the task of operating a dangerous vehicle). Right? But that wasn't part of the program. Doctor Oz wanted to make you aware of a much lesser, risk: Radio Frequency Radiation from your cell phone's antenna. It may cause brain cancer in a small number of individuals over a period of 30-40 years or so. Darn. Everybody in the audience was scared shitless, of course, right on cue. My favorite part of the show was the 'testimony' of a female expert on 'cancer causing toxins,' Dr. Devra Davis (a nice Jewish lady, of course). Doctor Devra was not as expert on electromagnetism as she may have been on chemistry, because she muddled her explanation of why the danger was greatest when the signal was weakest. Made no sense at all to me, and I'm an 'expert.' Do some cell phones increase power output in areas where the incoming signal is weak? If so, that might clarify her muddled explanation. To summarize this week's Dr. Oz shows: two thumbs down.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
The Malicious Meme
(5)
Time for our 'tonight's underpants segment.' I know you have been waiting for this. You love this feature. Ok. Tonight's underpants are 'JMS Sports Briefs. Orange. Dry at the moment. Size 12. Product of El Salvador.'
Before signing off tonight, I was pleased to see that TODAY did a segment on 'Circumcision' (infant male sexual mutilation). Good on ya, folks! Together, slowly, surely, we will eventually stamp out this Malicious Meme which haunts our sexual world.
I love you!
Time for our 'tonight's underpants segment.' I know you have been waiting for this. You love this feature. Ok. Tonight's underpants are 'JMS Sports Briefs. Orange. Dry at the moment. Size 12. Product of El Salvador.'
Before signing off tonight, I was pleased to see that TODAY did a segment on 'Circumcision' (infant male sexual mutilation). Good on ya, folks! Together, slowly, surely, we will eventually stamp out this Malicious Meme which haunts our sexual world.
I love you!
My Early Sexual Education
(4)
I add this photo because it seems to fit with the subject matter: The Virgin Mary prefers the colors blue and white, judging from Her statues and photographs.
Background: During my years at the Catholic Orphanage at 120 Queen Street (in Charleston, SC) I said The Rosary with the other boys every night for about three years. Each recitation involved 50 iterations of the 'Hail Mary:'
(Hail Mary, full of grace, The Lord is with Thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of our death. Amen.)
I must have said that mantra about 1000 times or more. A random boy would say the first part, then the rest of us would respond with the second part. Boring! But there was no way to escape the ritual as Sister Charlotte commandeered the evening after supper. We would all then take a shower and head upstairs to the dormitory. We would all eventually go to sleep. I would usually (at first) wake up in the middle of the night in wet underpants and a wet bed, having to pee yet again. Instead of going out to the boy's potty on the back portch I would empty my bladder in my wet jocky shorts. I would then masturbate to a stunning mind blowing orgasm. I learned about sex from that, and I have enjoyed auto-orgasmic sex since those days, and I still do it from time to time.
Did The Virgin Mary know about this? Probably not, but if worse comes to worst I intend to play those 1000 cards at the proper moment...
Be Heroic
(3)
Well folks, I can tell you that I was immensely relieved by that most recent phone call. Lucifer saved my butt!
But before I forget how to do it, here is tonight's link dump. Enjoy:
Mozart piano concerto number 26 part 1 of 2. This is part 1 of the first movement. This concerto is called 'The Coronation Concerto' for some reason. Glorious music!
This is part 2 of the first movement. Beautiful.
This is the second movement. Glorious.
This is the third movement. Sublime.
In other links, I love this story about an inventor who applied modern technology to an ancient problem: How to prevent the spread of disease among devout Catholics through Holy Water. Did this Catholic practice contribute to the high plague death toll in the Middle Ages?
Be Heroic! Nurses who have made a difference to infants they will never meet, male and female.
Carl Sagan was a Pothead! Little did we know at the time as we all did Marijuana before watching Cosmos. And now that I think about it, my 'alternative Christian myth' was inspired by Sagan's observation that, 'If you want to create an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent The Universe.' By the way, I read Lester Grinspoon's book, Psychelic Drugs Reconsidered, in the late '70s-early '80s.
Drench. I love this game! Begin with the square in the upper left hand corner. Select a new color. Your object is to 'drench the board' in a single color. It's addictive. You might want to wear a diaper...
And I love this story: O'bama actually insists on being Commander in Chief! Wow!
Well folks, I can tell you that I was immensely relieved by that most recent phone call. Lucifer saved my butt!
But before I forget how to do it, here is tonight's link dump. Enjoy:
Mozart piano concerto number 26 part 1 of 2. This is part 1 of the first movement. This concerto is called 'The Coronation Concerto' for some reason. Glorious music!
This is part 2 of the first movement. Beautiful.
This is the second movement. Glorious.
This is the third movement. Sublime.
In other links, I love this story about an inventor who applied modern technology to an ancient problem: How to prevent the spread of disease among devout Catholics through Holy Water. Did this Catholic practice contribute to the high plague death toll in the Middle Ages?
Be Heroic! Nurses who have made a difference to infants they will never meet, male and female.
Carl Sagan was a Pothead! Little did we know at the time as we all did Marijuana before watching Cosmos. And now that I think about it, my 'alternative Christian myth' was inspired by Sagan's observation that, 'If you want to create an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent The Universe.' By the way, I read Lester Grinspoon's book, Psychelic Drugs Reconsidered, in the late '70s-early '80s.
Drench. I love this game! Begin with the square in the upper left hand corner. Select a new color. Your object is to 'drench the board' in a single color. It's addictive. You might want to wear a diaper...
And I love this story: O'bama actually insists on being Commander in Chief! Wow!
Divine Dominatrix
(2)
Well, folks, you can imagine panic that phone call generated. I called Lucifer immediately:
----------
lu: Hello?
me: I am in deep doo-doo. I need help.
lu: At your service. What's the problem?
me: I am being blackmailed by the Blessed Virgin Mary!
lu: Now there's a twist...
me: I'm serious. I just got off the phone with Jesus. He spilled the beans to His Mother. I don't know what to do!
lu: Are you referring to the 'peed panty' thing?
me: Yes. How did you know?
lu: I have my sources. What does She want?
me: Panties.
lu: Figures.
me: There is no way I can supply Her with panties. She threatened to use her power against me. What does she mean by that?
lu: You do not want to know the answer to that question.
me: Help me!
lu: Calm down. We can do this. Relax. Take a deep breath. Think 'loophole.'
me: Einstein's Loophole in the Universe? It's two way?
lu: Exactly. We even do same day shipping.
me: Wow! Hell has panties?
lu: Billions and billions. I need size, quantity, color, and style.
me: Size 6, quantity seven. For starters.
lu: Your order has been entered and will be shipped within the hour. Credit Card Number?
----------
Well, folks, you can imagine panic that phone call generated. I called Lucifer immediately:
----------
lu: Hello?
me: I am in deep doo-doo. I need help.
lu: At your service. What's the problem?
me: I am being blackmailed by the Blessed Virgin Mary!
lu: Now there's a twist...
me: I'm serious. I just got off the phone with Jesus. He spilled the beans to His Mother. I don't know what to do!
lu: Are you referring to the 'peed panty' thing?
me: Yes. How did you know?
lu: I have my sources. What does She want?
me: Panties.
lu: Figures.
me: There is no way I can supply Her with panties. She threatened to use her power against me. What does she mean by that?
lu: You do not want to know the answer to that question.
me: Help me!
lu: Calm down. We can do this. Relax. Take a deep breath. Think 'loophole.'
me: Einstein's Loophole in the Universe? It's two way?
lu: Exactly. We even do same day shipping.
me: Wow! Hell has panties?
lu: Billions and billions. I need size, quantity, color, and style.
me: Size 6, quantity seven. For starters.
lu: Your order has been entered and will be shipped within the hour. Credit Card Number?
----------
Confession and Consequences
(1)
I love the first 20 minutes of a bike ride because the rush of blood to the brain results in an explosion of creativity. Today, for example, I was able to solve my 'Jesus dilema:' how to apologize to Jesus for making fun of His Mother. So let's get right to it before I forget. I dialed 123 on the brown telephone:
----------
js: Hello?
me: I have a confession to make.
js: You? Naw... No way...
me: Yep. I have sinned.
js: I am shocked. Shocked!
me: I made fun of Your Mother in my blog.
js: (laughing) You mean the 'peed panty' thing? Don't worry about it. No big deal.
me: Whew. For a while there I was worried...
js: In fact she laughed when I told her about it.
me: You told her? How did You know?
js: Your 'off switch' isn't as fast as you think it is.
me: Oops.
js: And by the way, she wants to try it.
me: Try what?
js: Peeing in her panties. She was fascinated by the scenerio, but there are no panties in Heaven.
me: I had no idea...
js: (interrupting) She wants some panties.
me: Unfortunately I...
js: (interrupting) She will not take 'No' for an answer. She is very serious about this.
me: But I have no way of providing...
js: (interrupting) She tells me that you have certain 'naughty connections,' and that you should exploit those 'connections.' Otherwise...
me: Ok, ok, I get the idea. Your Mother is not exactly a 'shrinking violet...'
js: She has considerable power, as you know. I showed her the videos.
me: The panty videos!?
js: Yep. I thought she would be amazed by modern human technology and she was. Then I told her about you and how...
me: What will happen to me if I am unable to provide her with panties?
js: You do not want to know the answer to that question.
me: What size?
js: Size six.
me: How many?
js: Seven pair. For starters.
me: Talk to you later. (click)
----------
I love the first 20 minutes of a bike ride because the rush of blood to the brain results in an explosion of creativity. Today, for example, I was able to solve my 'Jesus dilema:' how to apologize to Jesus for making fun of His Mother. So let's get right to it before I forget. I dialed 123 on the brown telephone:
----------
js: Hello?
me: I have a confession to make.
js: You? Naw... No way...
me: Yep. I have sinned.
js: I am shocked. Shocked!
me: I made fun of Your Mother in my blog.
js: (laughing) You mean the 'peed panty' thing? Don't worry about it. No big deal.
me: Whew. For a while there I was worried...
js: In fact she laughed when I told her about it.
me: You told her? How did You know?
js: Your 'off switch' isn't as fast as you think it is.
me: Oops.
js: And by the way, she wants to try it.
me: Try what?
js: Peeing in her panties. She was fascinated by the scenerio, but there are no panties in Heaven.
me: I had no idea...
js: (interrupting) She wants some panties.
me: Unfortunately I...
js: (interrupting) She will not take 'No' for an answer. She is very serious about this.
me: But I have no way of providing...
js: (interrupting) She tells me that you have certain 'naughty connections,' and that you should exploit those 'connections.' Otherwise...
me: Ok, ok, I get the idea. Your Mother is not exactly a 'shrinking violet...'
js: She has considerable power, as you know. I showed her the videos.
me: The panty videos!?
js: Yep. I thought she would be amazed by modern human technology and she was. Then I told her about you and how...
me: What will happen to me if I am unable to provide her with panties?
js: You do not want to know the answer to that question.
me: What size?
js: Size six.
me: How many?
js: Seven pair. For starters.
me: Talk to you later. (click)
----------
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Wake Up!
(10)
Time for me to wrap this up. See you all next week. In the meantime, do your research: Observe your logical and emotional backgrounds as you pee in your pants. Very important.
Nighty-night!
Time for me to wrap this up. See you all next week. In the meantime, do your research: Observe your logical and emotional backgrounds as you pee in your pants. Very important.
Nighty-night!
Tuesday, November 03, 2009
And Furtheremore...
Viva La Difference!
(8)
No two pussies are exactly alike. I love this photo!
Pet Training
(7)
Time to get serious with some naughty visuals and outrageous links:
Pet Training.
CLICK!
(6)
(My guess is that if anybody saw this coming it was Al Roker. You rock, Al!)
Last music for tonight is Mozart 17-3. Glorious. Notice the woman violinist staring smilingly at the handsome young pianist. Somebody's gonna get fucked tonight! I have this series on video tape. I want to upload it to YouTube, but don't know how to do it. Yet.
Which brings us to the (CLICK) in the previous post. The explanation is a bit complex: As many of you already know I am a Recovered Catholic. Fully recovered. It was the work of a lifetime and it is my proudest personal achievement. As a result, my brain developed an automatic 'Jesus switch.' It clicks into action whenever I think about any stuff which might offend Jesus. It is automatic and serves to prevent Jesus from reading my mind during 'embarrassing moments' if necessary. For example, whenever I am about to pee in my pants I say (privately) to Jesus something like, 'Better get out of my underpants before I drown your dumb ass! Fair warning!' The Jesus Swith always CLICKs in during such scenerios, saving me from possible embarrassment in the afterlife (if any). It never fails me.
And by the way, I thought I'd check in with Jesus just now. 'How's The Restoration going?' I dialed 123 on the brown telephone:
----------
js: Quite well. Thank you for your interest. And I absolutely loved those recent downloads! Glorious!
me: You have excellent taste.
js: I know, I know. You too. How may I help you?
me: You have already answered my question.
js: I know. I know. May I enquire of your knowlege concerning acoustical phenomenon?
me: Of course. Shoot.
js: I periodically get sudden auditory 'blank events,' followed by ringing in the ears. Any idea what might be the cause of this? There! It just happened again! Again! Again...
me: (Click)
----------
(My guess is that if anybody saw this coming it was Al Roker. You rock, Al!)
Last music for tonight is Mozart 17-3. Glorious. Notice the woman violinist staring smilingly at the handsome young pianist. Somebody's gonna get fucked tonight! I have this series on video tape. I want to upload it to YouTube, but don't know how to do it. Yet.
Which brings us to the (CLICK) in the previous post. The explanation is a bit complex: As many of you already know I am a Recovered Catholic. Fully recovered. It was the work of a lifetime and it is my proudest personal achievement. As a result, my brain developed an automatic 'Jesus switch.' It clicks into action whenever I think about any stuff which might offend Jesus. It is automatic and serves to prevent Jesus from reading my mind during 'embarrassing moments' if necessary. For example, whenever I am about to pee in my pants I say (privately) to Jesus something like, 'Better get out of my underpants before I drown your dumb ass! Fair warning!' The Jesus Swith always CLICKs in during such scenerios, saving me from possible embarrassment in the afterlife (if any). It never fails me.
And by the way, I thought I'd check in with Jesus just now. 'How's The Restoration going?' I dialed 123 on the brown telephone:
----------
js: Quite well. Thank you for your interest. And I absolutely loved those recent downloads! Glorious!
me: You have excellent taste.
js: I know, I know. You too. How may I help you?
me: You have already answered my question.
js: I know. I know. May I enquire of your knowlege concerning acoustical phenomenon?
me: Of course. Shoot.
js: I periodically get sudden auditory 'blank events,' followed by ringing in the ears. Any idea what might be the cause of this? There! It just happened again! Again! Again...
me: (Click)
----------
Tonight's Underpants!
(5)
Half the beer is gone, and time for me to get less serious. Yes, folks, it's time for me to reveal... Tonight's Underpants! (Heavy nose rad, sneezing) ----> LR)
Back again after about five minutes. Can we have a drum roll please? White Cotton Hi-cut size 14 JMS panties, product of El Salvador. Boring visually, but I have been running around the apartment all day enjoying the feeling of them slipping down under my shorts, then finally bottoming out and hanging out of my shorts embarrassingly. Erotic but visually boring. So I just now changed into a pair of pink nylon hi-cut panties made in Puerto Rico (if I read the label correctly): very sexy both in 'appearance' and 'feel.' Out of manufacture nowadays, apparently, and Size 13, this particular pair is much smaller, by the way, and I enjoyed the luscious feel of the elastic legs as I made my way to and fro the fridge in search of a new beer. ('I am alive!')
Indeed, I recently took stock of my panty collection. Wow! I didn't bother to count them but I did make an educated guess as to how many panties are in my collection: between 700 and 1000. Amazing. I am a male Imelda Markos (her fetish was shoes). Here are the mathematics:
14 plastic containers with 50 0r more pair of panties per container. I have most every style from thongs (one pair) to the most outrageously large (about size 18). I have noticed over the years that JMS has tended to reduce the largest (size 14) to a uniform size 14 today, but I have one pair of red cotton ribbed panties which is soooo large that the crotch actually hangs out of my shorts to my knees. The tag says size 14 but they must be more like size 18. I will never find another pair like that.
And now for tonight's shocker. But first I need to turn off my 'Jesus switch.' CLICK. (Doing Mozart 17-1-1 as I write this.) Are you ready for this? OK, here goes:
I peed in a new pair of white JMS size 14 cotton panties last night while I sat here in my waterproof executive lean-back swivel chair keeping my butt down as I perched my feet up relatively speaking. The pee slowly and sensously made its way downhill and eventually saturated the butt of my shorts and panties. I then changed into dry duds and hung the panties out (in my bedroom) to dry (Kootch allows me my bedroom privacy). (Now doing Mozart 2-1-1 OMG!) I just checked them recently before changing to my current pair. You will not believe this, folks, but there was the unmistakable outline of The Virgin Mary! In the butt of my peed panties! What a find!
The result is that now I am suffering in the throes of a huge dilemma: to wash or not to wash. Let me be very clear about this: I know for an absolute certainty that many New York Jews would give me at least 100,000 dollars for this pair of peed underpants. No question. What should I do?!
Half the beer is gone, and time for me to get less serious. Yes, folks, it's time for me to reveal... Tonight's Underpants! (Heavy nose rad, sneezing) ----> LR)
Back again after about five minutes. Can we have a drum roll please? White Cotton Hi-cut size 14 JMS panties, product of El Salvador. Boring visually, but I have been running around the apartment all day enjoying the feeling of them slipping down under my shorts, then finally bottoming out and hanging out of my shorts embarrassingly. Erotic but visually boring. So I just now changed into a pair of pink nylon hi-cut panties made in Puerto Rico (if I read the label correctly): very sexy both in 'appearance' and 'feel.' Out of manufacture nowadays, apparently, and Size 13, this particular pair is much smaller, by the way, and I enjoyed the luscious feel of the elastic legs as I made my way to and fro the fridge in search of a new beer. ('I am alive!')
Indeed, I recently took stock of my panty collection. Wow! I didn't bother to count them but I did make an educated guess as to how many panties are in my collection: between 700 and 1000. Amazing. I am a male Imelda Markos (her fetish was shoes). Here are the mathematics:
14 plastic containers with 50 0r more pair of panties per container. I have most every style from thongs (one pair) to the most outrageously large (about size 18). I have noticed over the years that JMS has tended to reduce the largest (size 14) to a uniform size 14 today, but I have one pair of red cotton ribbed panties which is soooo large that the crotch actually hangs out of my shorts to my knees. The tag says size 14 but they must be more like size 18. I will never find another pair like that.
And now for tonight's shocker. But first I need to turn off my 'Jesus switch.' CLICK. (Doing Mozart 17-1-1 as I write this.) Are you ready for this? OK, here goes:
I peed in a new pair of white JMS size 14 cotton panties last night while I sat here in my waterproof executive lean-back swivel chair keeping my butt down as I perched my feet up relatively speaking. The pee slowly and sensously made its way downhill and eventually saturated the butt of my shorts and panties. I then changed into dry duds and hung the panties out (in my bedroom) to dry (Kootch allows me my bedroom privacy). (Now doing Mozart 2-1-1 OMG!) I just checked them recently before changing to my current pair. You will not believe this, folks, but there was the unmistakable outline of The Virgin Mary! In the butt of my peed panties! What a find!
The result is that now I am suffering in the throes of a huge dilemma: to wash or not to wash. Let me be very clear about this: I know for an absolute certainty that many New York Jews would give me at least 100,000 dollars for this pair of peed underpants. No question. What should I do?!
Awake!
(4)
Speaking of the Today Show, their Friday pre-halloween show was the most spectacular ever. It brought back memories of the first time I ever saw Star Wars. Slightly buzzed on 'shrooms, I drove us all home that night in our '66 T-Bird totally awake. Good thing we had all shared the 'shrooms, otherwise I would not have been safe to drive, as a later experiment with LSD served to instruct me. (I had dropped a dose of Acid, but Jenny was not tripping with us that night and wanted me to drive her to a friend's house about ten minutes away. I figured I had plenty of time before the Acid kicked in. Wrong. The drive there was normal, but the return trip went rapidly downhill as my visual world became stranger and stranger. I slowed down accordingly, of course, and for a while I feared that I would not be able to find our home at 7152 South Franklin street even though I was on that street headed in the proper direction. The Acid took that opportunity to disassemble me even further, but my visual world began to make sense again about a block from our house and I managed to finish the trip without mishap as I recognized where I was. Whew! Close call... You do not want to spend an hour alone parked in your car doing Acid while your family searches for you.)
Speaking of the Today Show, their Friday pre-halloween show was the most spectacular ever. It brought back memories of the first time I ever saw Star Wars. Slightly buzzed on 'shrooms, I drove us all home that night in our '66 T-Bird totally awake. Good thing we had all shared the 'shrooms, otherwise I would not have been safe to drive, as a later experiment with LSD served to instruct me. (I had dropped a dose of Acid, but Jenny was not tripping with us that night and wanted me to drive her to a friend's house about ten minutes away. I figured I had plenty of time before the Acid kicked in. Wrong. The drive there was normal, but the return trip went rapidly downhill as my visual world became stranger and stranger. I slowed down accordingly, of course, and for a while I feared that I would not be able to find our home at 7152 South Franklin street even though I was on that street headed in the proper direction. The Acid took that opportunity to disassemble me even further, but my visual world began to make sense again about a block from our house and I managed to finish the trip without mishap as I recognized where I was. Whew! Close call... You do not want to spend an hour alone parked in your car doing Acid while your family searches for you.)
Baaad Idea
(3)
The American sexual catastrophe expresses itself in the Muslim world as a rage against (unmutilated) women and dogs. And this brings us back to the principal that, 'Modernity is the Acid Which Dissolves Ancientannity.' Which brings us to Afghanistan. (Huh?!)
I've been doing my research on the question of how to proceed in Afghanistan. I think that I now have the answer on how to proceed, or at least have the direction in which to proceed. Here it is:
We need to extricate. Carefully. We need to back out. But we also need to offer the powers that be there, reparations in the form of assistance toward modernization: better roads, more communications (radio, TV, telephone). A country which lacks the means of communication is not a country, nor is it part of a global community. We need to bring Afghanistan into the 21st century. I suggest that we cut off all aid to Israel and divert those funds instead to Afghanistan where they are really needed. Let the Jews in Israel tap their wealthy bretheren in America, not the US taxpayer. Enough of that, already. More than enough. Waaay more.
For the record I need to credit Matthew Hoh, a genuine American hero, who resigned a plush job in Afghanistan in protest of a disgracefully ignorant American policy there. The original interview with Hoh appeared on CNN's (Kootch just walked by me naked, waved, and said, 'Ta da' on her way to take a shower) Sunday Fareed Zacharia show, and Hoh also appeared on Monday's Today Show interviewed by Matt Lauer (I like those guys!). Buttressing my impressions of those interviews was the interview on CNN of Scott Ritter by Rick Sanchez today. Excellent! The final straw was supplied by video of the Senator from Israel (Lieberman) who was for a much expanded American presence in the region. Bad idea.
The American sexual catastrophe expresses itself in the Muslim world as a rage against (unmutilated) women and dogs. And this brings us back to the principal that, 'Modernity is the Acid Which Dissolves Ancientannity.' Which brings us to Afghanistan. (Huh?!)
I've been doing my research on the question of how to proceed in Afghanistan. I think that I now have the answer on how to proceed, or at least have the direction in which to proceed. Here it is:
We need to extricate. Carefully. We need to back out. But we also need to offer the powers that be there, reparations in the form of assistance toward modernization: better roads, more communications (radio, TV, telephone). A country which lacks the means of communication is not a country, nor is it part of a global community. We need to bring Afghanistan into the 21st century. I suggest that we cut off all aid to Israel and divert those funds instead to Afghanistan where they are really needed. Let the Jews in Israel tap their wealthy bretheren in America, not the US taxpayer. Enough of that, already. More than enough. Waaay more.
For the record I need to credit Matthew Hoh, a genuine American hero, who resigned a plush job in Afghanistan in protest of a disgracefully ignorant American policy there. The original interview with Hoh appeared on CNN's (Kootch just walked by me naked, waved, and said, 'Ta da' on her way to take a shower) Sunday Fareed Zacharia show, and Hoh also appeared on Monday's Today Show interviewed by Matt Lauer (I like those guys!). Buttressing my impressions of those interviews was the interview on CNN of Scott Ritter by Rick Sanchez today. Excellent! The final straw was supplied by video of the Senator from Israel (Lieberman) who was for a much expanded American presence in the region. Bad idea.
If it Feels Good, Lick it or Play With it.
(2)
I should mention that Nubs seemed a bit restless during the Today Show interview, and his owner kept pulling on Nubs' head in order to keep it in place next to his (the owner's) leg. My guess is that Nubs wanted to lick his penis which was well within reach given his body configuration at the time. Nubs eventually got to 'give it a lick' near the end of the interview. Conjecture: Nubs has loved licking his penis since he was a little doggie and in fact it was this particular aspect of his doggie personality which earned him his snipped ears from an enraged, penis-envious Arab male. Prove me wrong if you can.
Kootch and I watched today's Millionaire just before I began boozing it up for tonight's blog, and I remember a question which had the answer, 'Bark Mitzvah.' Apparently the 'Bark Mitzvah' is an American Jewish idea designed to make a little fun of the Jewish tradition of Bar Mitzvah. Do they place a little yarmulke on the pootch? American Jews are obviously way ahead of Arab Muslims in the 'penis envy department,' but I doubt there will ever be a 'Bark Brisa.'
And in a related development, yesterday's Doctor Oz actually addressed a real problem in American Sex Culture, using the words, 'sexual famine' and 'catastrophe' to describe the current American sexual crisis. He and Doctor Berman have launched a 'National Sex Experiment' to test whether his show can improve the American sexual condition. I doubt it, but this is the right direction. What is needed is for Doctor Oz (et al) to admit the obvious: infant sexual mutilation (circumcision) is a national tragedy and should be outlawed immediately.
I should mention that Nubs seemed a bit restless during the Today Show interview, and his owner kept pulling on Nubs' head in order to keep it in place next to his (the owner's) leg. My guess is that Nubs wanted to lick his penis which was well within reach given his body configuration at the time. Nubs eventually got to 'give it a lick' near the end of the interview. Conjecture: Nubs has loved licking his penis since he was a little doggie and in fact it was this particular aspect of his doggie personality which earned him his snipped ears from an enraged, penis-envious Arab male. Prove me wrong if you can.
Kootch and I watched today's Millionaire just before I began boozing it up for tonight's blog, and I remember a question which had the answer, 'Bark Mitzvah.' Apparently the 'Bark Mitzvah' is an American Jewish idea designed to make a little fun of the Jewish tradition of Bar Mitzvah. Do they place a little yarmulke on the pootch? American Jews are obviously way ahead of Arab Muslims in the 'penis envy department,' but I doubt there will ever be a 'Bark Brisa.'
And in a related development, yesterday's Doctor Oz actually addressed a real problem in American Sex Culture, using the words, 'sexual famine' and 'catastrophe' to describe the current American sexual crisis. He and Doctor Berman have launched a 'National Sex Experiment' to test whether his show can improve the American sexual condition. I doubt it, but this is the right direction. What is needed is for Doctor Oz (et al) to admit the obvious: infant sexual mutilation (circumcision) is a national tragedy and should be outlawed immediately.
More Mutilation Theory
(1)
Love those colors!
Kaiser update: We are agreed that the previously mentioned bill was an error. And BTW I mentioned during both phone calls that the reason Melissa refused to 'see me' was that I was recording the proceedings. Ironically, I was informed at the beginning of both conversations with Kaiser that my call might be recorded for quality control purposes. I had no objection of course. So why did Melissa (and her nurse) object to being recorded? Is deception part of the doctor-patient relationship at Kaiser? So it seems. My advice to all patients is to record their visits to their doctors for 'quality control reasons.' Should you tell your doctor sHe is being recorded? Probably not. Are there any brave fathers out there who are willing to record the sexual mutilations of their infant sons? And would the doctors involved agree to that? Can you imagine a family who is willing to record that mutilation and then show the video to the son on his 18th birthday? As a birthday present? Can you imagine a physician who is willing to allow his face and name to be included in such a video? Can you imagine a mother who would allow such a mutilation to take place in the maternity ward next to her bed? While she is awake?
The Today Show recently had a fun interview the owner of a male dog named, 'Nubs.' I loved it for its 'humanitarian aspects' but also for its educational aspects, in this case regarding the previously mentioned 'Mutilation Theory' (see below). Mutilation Theory suggests that Nubs' ears were mutilated for reasons of sexual rage: Apparently, Arab Muslims hate dogs because dogs are not circumcised. This hatred is sub rosa corticalus (if you will pardon my pig latin): the Muslim is enraged by the male dog's intact penis (the dog is superior 'down there'). The enraged Muslim would like to circumcise the dog; however such a scenerio would expose his own rage at his own mutilation for all the world to see. Muslim women would laugh (again sub rosa) as would other men, especially Western men. The Muslim man therefore takes out his uncontrollable rage on the dog's ears (which erect too often for Muslim male comfort).
And I could go on and on, of course, but buzz is increasing and time is short.
Love those colors!
Kaiser update: We are agreed that the previously mentioned bill was an error. And BTW I mentioned during both phone calls that the reason Melissa refused to 'see me' was that I was recording the proceedings. Ironically, I was informed at the beginning of both conversations with Kaiser that my call might be recorded for quality control purposes. I had no objection of course. So why did Melissa (and her nurse) object to being recorded? Is deception part of the doctor-patient relationship at Kaiser? So it seems. My advice to all patients is to record their visits to their doctors for 'quality control reasons.' Should you tell your doctor sHe is being recorded? Probably not. Are there any brave fathers out there who are willing to record the sexual mutilations of their infant sons? And would the doctors involved agree to that? Can you imagine a family who is willing to record that mutilation and then show the video to the son on his 18th birthday? As a birthday present? Can you imagine a physician who is willing to allow his face and name to be included in such a video? Can you imagine a mother who would allow such a mutilation to take place in the maternity ward next to her bed? While she is awake?
The Today Show recently had a fun interview the owner of a male dog named, 'Nubs.' I loved it for its 'humanitarian aspects' but also for its educational aspects, in this case regarding the previously mentioned 'Mutilation Theory' (see below). Mutilation Theory suggests that Nubs' ears were mutilated for reasons of sexual rage: Apparently, Arab Muslims hate dogs because dogs are not circumcised. This hatred is sub rosa corticalus (if you will pardon my pig latin): the Muslim is enraged by the male dog's intact penis (the dog is superior 'down there'). The enraged Muslim would like to circumcise the dog; however such a scenerio would expose his own rage at his own mutilation for all the world to see. Muslim women would laugh (again sub rosa) as would other men, especially Western men. The Muslim man therefore takes out his uncontrollable rage on the dog's ears (which erect too often for Muslim male comfort).
And I could go on and on, of course, but buzz is increasing and time is short.
