Friday, November 10, 2006
Sermon in Lieu of Attendance
(2)
I was pleasantly surprised by this week's sermon warning from the Arapahoe Road Baptist Church. Wow. What a subject. But what could it mean? Is it some sort of Rorschact inkblot test? How do you create a sermon out of that?
No doubt the sign generated huge curiosity 'mongst the faithful. No doubt many will attend tomorrow's sermon with 'bated breath. 'What can it mean?! This is exciting! Is Jesus just around the corner?!' Is Jesus in your rear view mirror?
There is no doubt that such a subject is open to a multitude of possible sermonistic interpretations, and that the sermonizer will come up with a religiously acceptable version. But where does that leave me? Sheeit. I have to do a sermon on this? Ok... I associate rear view mirrors with the idea of being followed. Who is behind me? Am I being followed? If so should I give a turn signal? (By the way, this edition of Friday Night Drunk is being brought to you by Mozart: Piano Concerto #21.)
These considerations having been stated I will launch into my Sermon in Lieu of Attendance:
----------
'Rear view mirror' refers to modern technology. Do you have a rear view mirror? Thank Technology. Technology needs Science. Thank Science. Science needs fearless curiosity. Thank fearless curiosity.
But it doesn't end there: Science needs logic. Science needs integrity. Illogical science doesn't work. Scam science doesn't work. You can't create a vaccine out of pipe dreams.
----------
End of sermon.
Labels: psychology, religion, science, technology
Saturday, November 04, 2006
So Naughty
(4)
I took this photo today. I saw it yesterday. In fact I always note the message on this particular sign, for some reason. I suppose I like the idea that the preacher is willing to warn you in advance of what the sermon will be. 'Fair warning! Use caution!'
But recently I have been paying attention to this sign for the purpose of inaugurating a new theme: Sermon in Lieu of Attendance. I borrowed the idea from my favorite Charleston yum-yum, who posts church photographs 'in lieu of attendance.' I love that. So naughty.
I took this photo today. I saw it yesterday. In fact I always note the message on this particular sign, for some reason. I suppose I like the idea that the preacher is willing to warn you in advance of what the sermon will be. 'Fair warning! Use caution!'
But recently I have been paying attention to this sign for the purpose of inaugurating a new theme: Sermon in Lieu of Attendance. I borrowed the idea from my favorite Charleston yum-yum, who posts church photographs 'in lieu of attendance.' I love that. So naughty.
I will exposite this week's 'sermon in lieu of attendance' in the next post.
I should mention that, in order not to put pressure on the hapless composer of this weekly missive, I will seek out other possible sources of inspiration in the future. I say this not because I would be afraid to do 'sermons' based on subjects determined by 'the other.' Not at all: I am afraid of nothing.
But I don't want to embarrass an innocent preacher.
Labels: religion
What am I? What are You?
(2)
Primitive religious beliefs can be dangerous in a modern world. Modern science and ancient superstitions are a volatile mix. In the interests of preventing an eventual catastrophic explosion in this regard some scientists and philosophers are becoming activists. They propose an end to the teaching of ancient superstitions in the form of 'religion.'
The crusade against religion (Wired) explores the question, 'Where do you stand with God?' It seems to me that this is a timely essay. It furthermore seems to me that I can no longer avoid the central issue. I have been called to declare myself. What am I? I have jokingly called my 'religious convictions' everything from 'Agnostic' to 'Pink Pantheist.' But these are little jokes. What am I really?
Firstly, I think that the question, 'Where do you stand with God' is a loaded question. I do not stand with God. Nor do I stand against God. I don't know God. Never met the sucker. So how can I declare a position in the matter?
I am certainly an Atheist regarding the Jewish god, WHTZSNM (pronounced, whatzisname), but I am willing to allow for the possibility that our glorious universe is the product of some unknown 'god' who is responsible for its existence. That would make me a 'Provisional Deist,' I suppose. I can not believe that such an unknown god would need to be 'worshipped' in the sense that the Jewish god needs it. The Jewish god's need for worship seems to me like an unhealthy addiction. An ego problem. A psychological disease. Nor can I believe that the creator of the universe had issues with bad behavior to the extent that he (she-it) would come up with the category, 'sin against god.' The idea seems ludicrous to me.
So count me as a Provisional Deist. 'Atheist' seems to be too anti-logical.
By the way, the Wired article had three glorious links which might interest you: The punk Rocker, the Illusionists, and the Scribe.
Primitive religious beliefs can be dangerous in a modern world. Modern science and ancient superstitions are a volatile mix. In the interests of preventing an eventual catastrophic explosion in this regard some scientists and philosophers are becoming activists. They propose an end to the teaching of ancient superstitions in the form of 'religion.'
The crusade against religion (Wired) explores the question, 'Where do you stand with God?' It seems to me that this is a timely essay. It furthermore seems to me that I can no longer avoid the central issue. I have been called to declare myself. What am I? I have jokingly called my 'religious convictions' everything from 'Agnostic' to 'Pink Pantheist.' But these are little jokes. What am I really?
Firstly, I think that the question, 'Where do you stand with God' is a loaded question. I do not stand with God. Nor do I stand against God. I don't know God. Never met the sucker. So how can I declare a position in the matter?
I am certainly an Atheist regarding the Jewish god, WHTZSNM (pronounced, whatzisname), but I am willing to allow for the possibility that our glorious universe is the product of some unknown 'god' who is responsible for its existence. That would make me a 'Provisional Deist,' I suppose. I can not believe that such an unknown god would need to be 'worshipped' in the sense that the Jewish god needs it. The Jewish god's need for worship seems to me like an unhealthy addiction. An ego problem. A psychological disease. Nor can I believe that the creator of the universe had issues with bad behavior to the extent that he (she-it) would come up with the category, 'sin against god.' The idea seems ludicrous to me.
So count me as a Provisional Deist. 'Atheist' seems to be too anti-logical.
By the way, the Wired article had three glorious links which might interest you: The punk Rocker, the Illusionists, and the Scribe.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Dialed God's Telephone Number: Nobody Answered.
(2)
Tonight is Halloween, of course. It is now 1920 Local and no (tap) Goblins yet. Kootch bought a bunch of candy, which remains mostly unmolested. It is a quiet night, perfect for blog stuff. I've looked through our pictures for Halloween themes and found one: Jenny the Frog. Unfortunately I am now unable to publish it here for some unknown reason. Maybe later.
Before I get too drunk I should probably visit a theme from a recent entry on one of my favorite blogs: that of the 'story in six words.' Can you write a story in six words? Sorta. I came up with the following SWS: 'Dialed God's telephone number. Nobody answered.' What a story!
The reader is immediately interested in possible details: What is the number?! Do you need a special telephone? Can I dial too? What if God doesn't answer? What could it mean?
The theme reminds me of the 'Zen Koan.'
Somewhat related is the 'religious joke.' My favorite religious joke is from Mulla Nasrudin (as told by Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh in The Mustard Seed):
'Mulla Nasruddin was sitting with a friend. His wife came and the friend said, "I suppose this is your most charming wife!" Mulla Nasruddin looked sadly and said, "This is my only wife!"
I commiserate with the mulla.
Tonight is Halloween, of course. It is now 1920 Local and no (tap) Goblins yet. Kootch bought a bunch of candy, which remains mostly unmolested. It is a quiet night, perfect for blog stuff. I've looked through our pictures for Halloween themes and found one: Jenny the Frog. Unfortunately I am now unable to publish it here for some unknown reason. Maybe later.
Before I get too drunk I should probably visit a theme from a recent entry on one of my favorite blogs: that of the 'story in six words.' Can you write a story in six words? Sorta. I came up with the following SWS: 'Dialed God's telephone number. Nobody answered.' What a story!
The reader is immediately interested in possible details: What is the number?! Do you need a special telephone? Can I dial too? What if God doesn't answer? What could it mean?
The theme reminds me of the 'Zen Koan.'
Somewhat related is the 'religious joke.' My favorite religious joke is from Mulla Nasrudin (as told by Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh in The Mustard Seed):
'Mulla Nasruddin was sitting with a friend. His wife came and the friend said, "I suppose this is your most charming wife!" Mulla Nasruddin looked sadly and said, "This is my only wife!"
I commiserate with the mulla.
Labels: halloween, joke, Rajneesh, religion, zen
Friday, October 13, 2006
Eternal Life
(4)
And what a glorious freedom it is!
I should address the fear of Satan too, while I'm on the subject of Existential Fear. Fear of Satan relates to fear of God: both are figments which have no basis in reality. Likewise, the fear of Hell. There is no Hell, no Heaven. Someday you will die forever. You will never return. As one of my favorite web sites proclaims: 'Life is short: make fun of it!'
The downside of nonbelief is that you will have to live with the idea that you will die forever. At first glance this is a horrifying prospect. But is it? Think:
The Universe began about 13 billion years ago. You only arrived recently. You missed the first 13 billion. Do you feel sad about that? Not exactly. Did you really miss it? Not exactly. You weren't there!
The Universe may last for another 13 billion years (or many more). You will die forever and therefore you will miss all those years. It might be a trillion years and you will miss them all. Should you be sad about that? Not at all: you won't be there either. You weren't there for the first 13 billion and you won't be there for the last trillion. Thank God! It could be much worse.
But you long for eternal life. You want to live forever. You equate the two. Wrong: you will not live forever but you already have Eternal Life.
And what a glorious freedom it is!
I should address the fear of Satan too, while I'm on the subject of Existential Fear. Fear of Satan relates to fear of God: both are figments which have no basis in reality. Likewise, the fear of Hell. There is no Hell, no Heaven. Someday you will die forever. You will never return. As one of my favorite web sites proclaims: 'Life is short: make fun of it!'
The downside of nonbelief is that you will have to live with the idea that you will die forever. At first glance this is a horrifying prospect. But is it? Think:
The Universe began about 13 billion years ago. You only arrived recently. You missed the first 13 billion. Do you feel sad about that? Not exactly. Did you really miss it? Not exactly. You weren't there!
The Universe may last for another 13 billion years (or many more). You will die forever and therefore you will miss all those years. It might be a trillion years and you will miss them all. Should you be sad about that? Not at all: you won't be there either. You weren't there for the first 13 billion and you won't be there for the last trillion. Thank God! It could be much worse.
But you long for eternal life. You want to live forever. You equate the two. Wrong: you will not live forever but you already have Eternal Life.
Labels: fear of God, religion
The Existential Fear of God
(3)
What I would like to address tonight is your fear of God. You may not even aware of it, but if you fear God, that fear will subtly influence much of your behavior depending on what you think about 'the will of God.' Your fear will in a sense form your behavior. Hence the 'fear of God' is a 'cultural fear' which is far more significant than, for example, your 'fear of heights.'
'Fear of God' figures prominently in the modern social phenomenon known as 'The Culture Wars.' Jews (boom), for example, sexually mutilate their male children on the eighth day after birth out of their fear of God - the God they invented. Muslims follow that unfortunate Jewish sexual prescription. Both religions rely on sexual mutilation to suppress male masturbation because both religions regard that very normal activity as displeasing to God. The result is intercultural (boom) penis envy, not to mention huge amounts of sexual misery.
Your fear of God will be amplified if you think that God can read your thoughts. Your fear of God will be doubly amplified if you think that God cares about what your thoughts really are. If you think that God can read your thoughts and that furthermore God makes judgements about what you think you will be concerned into changing your behavior to conform with whatever religious mores you are inclined to believe. This effect is even further amplified if you believe in a life after death wherein God 'takes revenge' on those whose thoughts and actions displeased Him.
And if you believe that God will punish you forever in Hell for what you think and do while you are alive then you will be literally terrified into behaving in certain stereotypical ways.
The key word here is, 'believe.' You must believe. If you don't believe, you are free: free from the Existential Fear of God.
What I would like to address tonight is your fear of God. You may not even aware of it, but if you fear God, that fear will subtly influence much of your behavior depending on what you think about 'the will of God.' Your fear will in a sense form your behavior. Hence the 'fear of God' is a 'cultural fear' which is far more significant than, for example, your 'fear of heights.'
'Fear of God' figures prominently in the modern social phenomenon known as 'The Culture Wars.' Jews (boom), for example, sexually mutilate their male children on the eighth day after birth out of their fear of God - the God they invented. Muslims follow that unfortunate Jewish sexual prescription. Both religions rely on sexual mutilation to suppress male masturbation because both religions regard that very normal activity as displeasing to God. The result is intercultural (boom) penis envy, not to mention huge amounts of sexual misery.
Your fear of God will be amplified if you think that God can read your thoughts. Your fear of God will be doubly amplified if you think that God cares about what your thoughts really are. If you think that God can read your thoughts and that furthermore God makes judgements about what you think you will be concerned into changing your behavior to conform with whatever religious mores you are inclined to believe. This effect is even further amplified if you believe in a life after death wherein God 'takes revenge' on those whose thoughts and actions displeased Him.
And if you believe that God will punish you forever in Hell for what you think and do while you are alive then you will be literally terrified into behaving in certain stereotypical ways.
The key word here is, 'believe.' You must believe. If you don't believe, you are free: free from the Existential Fear of God.
Labels: fear of God, religion
