Friday, January 17, 2014
God Behaving Badly.
(1)
Sipping on beer #2 at 1837! I'm late! Sip. I finished beer #1 while watching the evening news. Sip. This was one of those 'touch and go' days: to Blog or not to Blog. Sip. Not enough sleep last night because of microwave radiation from above and below left me a bit groggy. A nap was indicated. But after a two hour session in bed being zapped from above and below (and no actual sleep), I was still not quite ready to call it a Blog night. So I did another hour and 15 minutes in bed. I may have got a few minutes of actual sleep. In any case, I felt 'Blogworthy' after getting out of the sack, went to the LR, popped open a beer, and watched the news. Sip. 18 beers left. Sip. Time to reread last week...
Ah, yes. God. What an Ass Hole. The Bible has another example in Exodus: The Jews (God's Chosen People) were slaves in Egypt. God decided to rescue them. He contacts Moses, Head Jew at the time. God hatches a plot with Moses to impress the Egyptian boss, Pharaoh, with a series of successive disasters, the idea being to convince Pharoh to, 'Let my people go.' Pharaoh was unimpressed with all of the disasters. He gave the impression of being 'one stubborn motherfucka,' but his 'stubbornness' was actually imposed from above: God, 'Hardened Pharaoh's heart.' That is to say, Pharaoh's 'free will' was 'temporarily suspended in the matter,' as Pharaoh became a 'stooge' of God. High drama! Muthafuck!
Meanwhile, the people of Egypt suffered from plague after plague:
1. The Nile turns to blood. Yuck.
2. The frogs invade Egypt. The French? Huh? Whaaa...?
3. Lice. Yeeesh. Dust turns into lice! BTW, Pharaoh's majicians could not duplicate this particular trick for some reason...
4. Swarms of flies. Bzzzzz... Slap. Ouch.
5. All of the Egyptian cattle die. (God punishes the cattle! Typical god behavior.)
6. The Egyptians get rotsa boils. Pop. Sip. Yuck.
7. Hail from Heaven kills all the Egyptian cattle again. Huh? Again?
8. Locusts. Billions upon billions upon billions.
9. Three days of darkness. Zat all?! Zzzzzzzzz! Love it!
10. God kills all the first born Egyptian children and all the firstborn cattle. Again. (Huh? What did God have against cows?!)
After this final atrocity, a now soft-hearted Pharaoh 'sees the light' and lets the Jews go. And good-fuckin-riddance?
Uhuh. Pharaoh sends his armies after the fleeing Jews and they are eventually drowned in the Red Sea. QED.
Sip. Makes a really good movie.
Sipping on beer #2 at 1837! I'm late! Sip. I finished beer #1 while watching the evening news. Sip. This was one of those 'touch and go' days: to Blog or not to Blog. Sip. Not enough sleep last night because of microwave radiation from above and below left me a bit groggy. A nap was indicated. But after a two hour session in bed being zapped from above and below (and no actual sleep), I was still not quite ready to call it a Blog night. So I did another hour and 15 minutes in bed. I may have got a few minutes of actual sleep. In any case, I felt 'Blogworthy' after getting out of the sack, went to the LR, popped open a beer, and watched the news. Sip. 18 beers left. Sip. Time to reread last week...
Ah, yes. God. What an Ass Hole. The Bible has another example in Exodus: The Jews (God's Chosen People) were slaves in Egypt. God decided to rescue them. He contacts Moses, Head Jew at the time. God hatches a plot with Moses to impress the Egyptian boss, Pharaoh, with a series of successive disasters, the idea being to convince Pharoh to, 'Let my people go.' Pharaoh was unimpressed with all of the disasters. He gave the impression of being 'one stubborn motherfucka,' but his 'stubbornness' was actually imposed from above: God, 'Hardened Pharaoh's heart.' That is to say, Pharaoh's 'free will' was 'temporarily suspended in the matter,' as Pharaoh became a 'stooge' of God. High drama! Muthafuck!
Meanwhile, the people of Egypt suffered from plague after plague:
1. The Nile turns to blood. Yuck.
2. The frogs invade Egypt. The French? Huh? Whaaa...?
3. Lice. Yeeesh. Dust turns into lice! BTW, Pharaoh's majicians could not duplicate this particular trick for some reason...
4. Swarms of flies. Bzzzzz... Slap. Ouch.
5. All of the Egyptian cattle die. (God punishes the cattle! Typical god behavior.)
6. The Egyptians get rotsa boils. Pop. Sip. Yuck.
7. Hail from Heaven kills all the Egyptian cattle again. Huh? Again?
8. Locusts. Billions upon billions upon billions.
9. Three days of darkness. Zat all?! Zzzzzzzzz! Love it!
10. God kills all the first born Egyptian children and all the firstborn cattle. Again. (Huh? What did God have against cows?!)
After this final atrocity, a now soft-hearted Pharaoh 'sees the light' and lets the Jews go. And good-fuckin-riddance?
Uhuh. Pharaoh sends his armies after the fleeing Jews and they are eventually drowned in the Red Sea. QED.
Sip. Makes a really good movie.
