Friday, August 10, 2012
The Myth Test
(2)
'The Myth Test' refers to my version of the Judeo-Christian-Muslim Myth (Monotheism). It is my own 'creation' which is to say that it is a 'plausible variant' given the ancient religious texts available. True, it is not at all 'Muslim,' because Mohammedism is a relatively recent iteration of the Judeo-Christian myth and I know very little about that religion. (Face Rad causing nose dripping as I wrote that.) My version of the Judeo-Christian Myth therefore contains nothing at all relating specifically to Mohammedism. So tonight's 'test' is a simple 'multiple choice' test. I will provide the answers next week. Sip.
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1. The Jewish God's name and phone number is:
a. WHTZSNM - 666
b. WHTHFCK - 666
c. MNYHNY - 666
2. Sip. The Universe is a product of
a. Intelligent Design
b. Unintelligent Design
c. The individual perceiver.
3. Sip. The Holy Ghost speaks in
a. Consonants only
b. Vowels only
c. Tongues
4. Jesus is now living
a. On Hell
b. In Heaven
c. On a spaceship
5. Jesus is nowadays very busy as
a. A psychiatrist
b. A stockbroker
c. A chimp
6. The Virgin Mary is currently addicted to
a. Panties
b. Bloody Marys
c. My Blog
(Back from the fridge with beer #7. Kootch is watching last night's Bronco Game on her TiVo.)
7. History's most memorable 'premature ejaculation' was
a. 'Let there be light!?'
b. 'OMG! Sorry, Mary.'
c. 'Ok. Ya got me.'
8. The Brown Telephone was invented by
a. Galileo
b. Abraham
c. Bell
9. The average daytime temperature is:
a. Hell: 80 degrees F.
b. Heaven: 10 degrees Kelvin.
c. Pluto: 12 degrees Kelvin.
10. The Brown Telephone requires 'an antenna' to work properly. The only adequate antenna for The Brown Telephone is:
a. The user's middle finger.
b. A fork.
c. The user's tongue.
----------
'The Myth Test' refers to my version of the Judeo-Christian-Muslim Myth (Monotheism). It is my own 'creation' which is to say that it is a 'plausible variant' given the ancient religious texts available. True, it is not at all 'Muslim,' because Mohammedism is a relatively recent iteration of the Judeo-Christian myth and I know very little about that religion. (Face Rad causing nose dripping as I wrote that.) My version of the Judeo-Christian Myth therefore contains nothing at all relating specifically to Mohammedism. So tonight's 'test' is a simple 'multiple choice' test. I will provide the answers next week. Sip.
----------
1. The Jewish God's name and phone number is:
a. WHTZSNM - 666
b. WHTHFCK - 666
c. MNYHNY - 666
2. Sip. The Universe is a product of
a. Intelligent Design
b. Unintelligent Design
c. The individual perceiver.
3. Sip. The Holy Ghost speaks in
a. Consonants only
b. Vowels only
c. Tongues
4. Jesus is now living
a. On Hell
b. In Heaven
c. On a spaceship
5. Jesus is nowadays very busy as
a. A psychiatrist
b. A stockbroker
c. A chimp
6. The Virgin Mary is currently addicted to
a. Panties
b. Bloody Marys
c. My Blog
(Back from the fridge with beer #7. Kootch is watching last night's Bronco Game on her TiVo.)
7. History's most memorable 'premature ejaculation' was
a. 'Let there be light!?'
b. 'OMG! Sorry, Mary.'
c. 'Ok. Ya got me.'
8. The Brown Telephone was invented by
a. Galileo
b. Abraham
c. Bell
9. The average daytime temperature is:
a. Hell: 80 degrees F.
b. Heaven: 10 degrees Kelvin.
c. Pluto: 12 degrees Kelvin.
10. The Brown Telephone requires 'an antenna' to work properly. The only adequate antenna for The Brown Telephone is:
a. The user's middle finger.
b. A fork.
c. The user's tongue.
----------
