Friday, September 09, 2011
The Smell Test.
(3)
Whew. All that obligatory stuff is out of the way, the Evening News is done, and I am about to finish beer #4. Only 12 beers remaining... Back from the fridge with beer #5 at (about) 1835. Kootch hit the sack about an hour ago. The stalkers above are as quiet as mice in heat (faint boom). Buzzing nicely! Sip. I am now at my most dangerous. Yas... The various possibilities are competing for attention in my inebriated brain... Standby... Ok. After a bit of consideration (faint thump) I will address 'The Smell Test.' Some of you uhh, 'insiders,' already know about this. I need some music. Hmm. Karajan. The Blue Danube.
'The Smell Test' was supposed to happen yesterday. A letter to that effect arrived in the mail about two weeks ago. The 'management company' running things for our (boom) 'condo association' informed us in that letter that two of our buildings were in the midst of a 'bedbug infestation.' Our building was one of the two. Horrors!
Obviously concerned for our collective well-being (tap), The Company planned to hire a 'bedbug sniffer dog' to sniff all apartments in the two affected buildings. (Damned white of 'em!) But the problem was that it was not presented as 'an offer to assist.' Not at all. It was presented as a Threat; a threat to forceably enter (invade) any apartment which refused to cooperate in the Great Bedbug Search! Sheeit!
Kootch was horrified (tap). She waited until Sunday to give me the letter. By that time (tap) I had recovered from Saturday's hangover.
Whew. All that obligatory stuff is out of the way, the Evening News is done, and I am about to finish beer #4. Only 12 beers remaining... Back from the fridge with beer #5 at (about) 1835. Kootch hit the sack about an hour ago. The stalkers above are as quiet as mice in heat (faint boom). Buzzing nicely! Sip. I am now at my most dangerous. Yas... The various possibilities are competing for attention in my inebriated brain... Standby... Ok. After a bit of consideration (faint thump) I will address 'The Smell Test.' Some of you uhh, 'insiders,' already know about this. I need some music. Hmm. Karajan. The Blue Danube.
'The Smell Test' was supposed to happen yesterday. A letter to that effect arrived in the mail about two weeks ago. The 'management company' running things for our (boom) 'condo association' informed us in that letter that two of our buildings were in the midst of a 'bedbug infestation.' Our building was one of the two. Horrors!
Obviously concerned for our collective well-being (tap), The Company planned to hire a 'bedbug sniffer dog' to sniff all apartments in the two affected buildings. (Damned white of 'em!) But the problem was that it was not presented as 'an offer to assist.' Not at all. It was presented as a Threat; a threat to forceably enter (invade) any apartment which refused to cooperate in the Great Bedbug Search! Sheeit!
Kootch was horrified (tap). She waited until Sunday to give me the letter. By that time (tap) I had recovered from Saturday's hangover.
