Wednesday, November 17, 2010
The Jewish Dilemma
(2)
Working on beer #4 at 1400. The Jewish Dilemma. Hmm...
The Jewish Dilemma is that American Jews nowadays find themselves in an untenable position with regard to their traditional (mutilated) penis. Their problem is, and always was, that the mutilated version is/was far inferior to the original version provided by Mother Nature. The result was something I call 'penis envy', a term apparently invented by Sigmund Freud to deflect - at least temporarily - an otherwise obvious conclusion. Freud saddled young girls with the penis envy problem. It was a 'maturation issue.' Eheh. Bullshit. The idea crashed as it became clear that men - not women or little girls - suffered from penis envy. And suffer they do. Size is a good example. Men with small schmeckles (is that a Yiddish word?) envy men with larger schmeckles. And furthermore, men with mutilated (circumcised) schmeckles envy men with natural schmeckles. It's only natural. Circumcised men even envy male dogs. Go figure.
Why this envy? Isn't the circumcised version much more 'aerodynamic' and pleasing to the eye? Isn't the natural version much more disgusting with its turtle-neck appearance and its complexity? And what about that vile smegma?! Yuck. And not only that - you have to wash the fucking thing. Takes at least 5 or 6 seconds in the shower. Is that 'time well spent?'
And what about hip-joint disease? (tap) What about all those diseases (including HIV-AIDS) and infirmities which are prevented or cured by circumcision? There must be thirty or forty diseases which can be cured or prevented by circumcision. Are you mad?! The answer is circumcision! You idiot!
That was the Jewish Shtick. It worked well for an entire century (being gassed here) in America. (Right eye watering profusely, right nostril dripping, presumably from microwave radiation above or below- probably from the bathroom. Both nostrils have been dripping after each trip to the fridge for a beer, indicating that most of the radiation comes from above.)
Kootch just returned from getting her eyes checked at Kaiser. She has catracts in both eyes, according to her eye doctor, Kristine Ernewein, who explained that her condition is a normal result of 'old age.' She is the same eye doctor who examined me a year or two ago (much'tapping' above as I typed this, and now the editor is the way it acted (tap) last week.)
Working on beer #4 at 1400. The Jewish Dilemma. Hmm...
The Jewish Dilemma is that American Jews nowadays find themselves in an untenable position with regard to their traditional (mutilated) penis. Their problem is, and always was, that the mutilated version is/was far inferior to the original version provided by Mother Nature. The result was something I call 'penis envy', a term apparently invented by Sigmund Freud to deflect - at least temporarily - an otherwise obvious conclusion. Freud saddled young girls with the penis envy problem. It was a 'maturation issue.' Eheh. Bullshit. The idea crashed as it became clear that men - not women or little girls - suffered from penis envy. And suffer they do. Size is a good example. Men with small schmeckles (is that a Yiddish word?) envy men with larger schmeckles. And furthermore, men with mutilated (circumcised) schmeckles envy men with natural schmeckles. It's only natural. Circumcised men even envy male dogs. Go figure.
Why this envy? Isn't the circumcised version much more 'aerodynamic' and pleasing to the eye? Isn't the natural version much more disgusting with its turtle-neck appearance and its complexity? And what about that vile smegma?! Yuck. And not only that - you have to wash the fucking thing. Takes at least 5 or 6 seconds in the shower. Is that 'time well spent?'
And what about hip-joint disease? (tap) What about all those diseases (including HIV-AIDS) and infirmities which are prevented or cured by circumcision? There must be thirty or forty diseases which can be cured or prevented by circumcision. Are you mad?! The answer is circumcision! You idiot!
That was the Jewish Shtick. It worked well for an entire century (being gassed here) in America. (Right eye watering profusely, right nostril dripping, presumably from microwave radiation above or below- probably from the bathroom. Both nostrils have been dripping after each trip to the fridge for a beer, indicating that most of the radiation comes from above.)
Kootch just returned from getting her eyes checked at Kaiser. She has catracts in both eyes, according to her eye doctor, Kristine Ernewein, who explained that her condition is a normal result of 'old age.' She is the same eye doctor who examined me a year or two ago (much'tapping' above as I typed this, and now the editor is the way it acted (tap) last week.)
