Friday, March 13, 2009
The Art of the Fart
(3)
Another 'advantage' of being watched and listened-to on a 24/7 basis is that I get to insult my audience at will, and I take advantage of that from time to time, though not excessively. For example, I've discovered that they use amplifiers in an attempt to detect even the (Kootch just advised me that 'potato salad is done.' Good girl!) most barely audible mutterings - I am an habitual 'out loud thinker.' These amplifiers must be of the 'noise-canceling' type, because even though my 'under breath' auditory musings are done in a noisy mileau (noisy air-cleaner in operation), my barely audible musings are often responded to. I presume that the purpose of such revelations is to suggest that even my thoughts are accessible. (I have tested that hypotheses and found it wanting.) Anyways, Knowing that any sounds in my room are amplified in the earphones (presumably) of some Judeo-Faggot Turkey observing from above, I have developed what I call, 'the art of the fart:' That is to say, I have become very profficient at the art of 'flatulence sonics.' That is to say that I have learned how to produce a really mean-sounding fart. I love to imagine the consternation produced in my hapless listener at having to listen to a sudden obscene noisy rectal exhalation. I do it as often as I can, of course, especially at night. I also add as much auditory embellishment as possible to belches during daytime, the guiding principle of both being that the listener is invariably 'grossed out' while the perpetrator is, under certain circumstances, Quite pleased.
Another 'advantage' of being watched and listened-to on a 24/7 basis is that I get to insult my audience at will, and I take advantage of that from time to time, though not excessively. For example, I've discovered that they use amplifiers in an attempt to detect even the (Kootch just advised me that 'potato salad is done.' Good girl!) most barely audible mutterings - I am an habitual 'out loud thinker.' These amplifiers must be of the 'noise-canceling' type, because even though my 'under breath' auditory musings are done in a noisy mileau (noisy air-cleaner in operation), my barely audible musings are often responded to. I presume that the purpose of such revelations is to suggest that even my thoughts are accessible. (I have tested that hypotheses and found it wanting.) Anyways, Knowing that any sounds in my room are amplified in the earphones (presumably) of some Judeo-Faggot Turkey observing from above, I have developed what I call, 'the art of the fart:' That is to say, I have become very profficient at the art of 'flatulence sonics.' That is to say that I have learned how to produce a really mean-sounding fart. I love to imagine the consternation produced in my hapless listener at having to listen to a sudden obscene noisy rectal exhalation. I do it as often as I can, of course, especially at night. I also add as much auditory embellishment as possible to belches during daytime, the guiding principle of both being that the listener is invariably 'grossed out' while the perpetrator is, under certain circumstances, Quite pleased.
