Friday, September 05, 2008
Be Gentle
(3)
(Alright! It worked!)
Having got Jesus' permission to give his number to Lucifer, I called Lucifer:
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lu: Hello?
me: I just finished talking to Jesus on 123. It seems to me that He could use a little sex ed. Would you be willing to explain the facts of life to Jesus?
lu: Jesus? Sounds familiar. I have vague memories of a desert meeting where He asked me to 'follow Him.'
me: Yep. That's The One. He's on a space ship heading home at the speed of light. Be another three years or so before He arrives. He's cold and bored. And ignorant. He needs a mentor.
lu: I would be honored. 123?
me: 123.
lu: Any special instructions?
me: He's circumcised.
lu: Oops. That presents familial/tribal/mechanical problems.
me: Yes, I know. Be gentle. And remember: He's cold and needs to warm up. His current method is pushups.
lu: Done.
----------
(Alright! It worked!)
Having got Jesus' permission to give his number to Lucifer, I called Lucifer:
----------
lu: Hello?
me: I just finished talking to Jesus on 123. It seems to me that He could use a little sex ed. Would you be willing to explain the facts of life to Jesus?
lu: Jesus? Sounds familiar. I have vague memories of a desert meeting where He asked me to 'follow Him.'
me: Yep. That's The One. He's on a space ship heading home at the speed of light. Be another three years or so before He arrives. He's cold and bored. And ignorant. He needs a mentor.
lu: I would be honored. 123?
me: 123.
lu: Any special instructions?
me: He's circumcised.
lu: Oops. That presents familial/tribal/mechanical problems.
me: Yes, I know. Be gentle. And remember: He's cold and needs to warm up. His current method is pushups.
lu: Done.
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