Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Waiting for Anna
(1)
She was not at all happy to see me. It had been a long day for her, apparently, and her usual smile was missing, replaced by a frown.
Her RN advised me at about 1420 that she was running 30 minutes late. I waited. Various people came and went. Before long only two of us 'originals' were left. I expected the last 'original' to be called next. Wrong.
She was sitting in a spot where she could view the entire panorama: both hallways, plus the waiting area. I caught her staring at me a few times, and eventually concluded that she was a 'watcher.' I flipped her an 'ear job.' Although she remained for most of the time I was there, I would not catch her staring at me again.
Eventually a 'cougher' came in and sat very close to me. I got up immediately and said, 'Nothing personal, honey,' and moved away from her to the other side of the room. I would meet the 'cougher' ten or trenty minutes later in another hallway as I returned from exploring the local area. She was talking to some idiot in the middle of the hallway. She never reappeared in the waiting room. She coughed as I approached her. I held my breath and headed past her on my way back to the waiting area.
I waited for a while, then felt a fart bubble making its way down the sigmoid colon. I had to fart. Before long I felt the same fart bubble make its way back up the sigmoid colon, then back down again. I decided that I had better fart before seeing the doctor. I got up and headed down the halway. Once out of sight, I grabbed my left cheek and tried to pull it out of the way. Then I farted. A loud fart noise reverberated down the hallway. Oops! But nobody noticed.
After a few minutes I made my way back to the waiting area.
I watched more patients come and go.
Eventually, Doctor Anna's RN came out and rescued me. We skipped the weight check (I had got weighed two days before). BP was about 138 over 75. I said, 'White coat syndrome!' RN was not amused.
She was not at all happy to see me. It had been a long day for her, apparently, and her usual smile was missing, replaced by a frown.
Her RN advised me at about 1420 that she was running 30 minutes late. I waited. Various people came and went. Before long only two of us 'originals' were left. I expected the last 'original' to be called next. Wrong.
She was sitting in a spot where she could view the entire panorama: both hallways, plus the waiting area. I caught her staring at me a few times, and eventually concluded that she was a 'watcher.' I flipped her an 'ear job.' Although she remained for most of the time I was there, I would not catch her staring at me again.
Eventually a 'cougher' came in and sat very close to me. I got up immediately and said, 'Nothing personal, honey,' and moved away from her to the other side of the room. I would meet the 'cougher' ten or trenty minutes later in another hallway as I returned from exploring the local area. She was talking to some idiot in the middle of the hallway. She never reappeared in the waiting room. She coughed as I approached her. I held my breath and headed past her on my way back to the waiting area.
I waited for a while, then felt a fart bubble making its way down the sigmoid colon. I had to fart. Before long I felt the same fart bubble make its way back up the sigmoid colon, then back down again. I decided that I had better fart before seeing the doctor. I got up and headed down the halway. Once out of sight, I grabbed my left cheek and tried to pull it out of the way. Then I farted. A loud fart noise reverberated down the hallway. Oops! But nobody noticed.
After a few minutes I made my way back to the waiting area.
I watched more patients come and go.
Eventually, Doctor Anna's RN came out and rescued me. We skipped the weight check (I had got weighed two days before). BP was about 138 over 75. I said, 'White coat syndrome!' RN was not amused.
