Wednesday, October 31, 2007
My Halloween Costume
(2)
ABC News had a few interesting Halloween tidbits tonight:
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Head stab
MRSA
Adult Halloween Dress
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The Head stab piece was about some guy who got stabbed in the head and lost some sensation in his face as a result. This clicked with my awareness of the Judeo/Muslim practice of infant circumcision which stabs you in the 'other head' and removes sensation from your future sex life. Supposed to be very pleasing to god, the practice is widespread, especially in America. The vast majority of the world's males remain uncircumcised, and this fact no doubt irritates god constantly as he attends to each and every case of male masturbation personally, the ultimate witness to a grievous sin, punishable in Hell.
Then there is MRSA, a staph infection which has evolved to resist modern antibiotics. This problem can be by-passed with older cures (for example, Isodine) which you apply to the infection site immediately upon noticing redness following a skin break. Isodine also works well against adult diaper rash (eheh) but if you find yourself resorting often to Isodine in the absense of a bladder control problem you may be well advised to consult the services of a sex counselor. Avoid psychiatrists: they don't know doggie-doo. Really.
Bringing us to my Halloween Dress. Seeing the piece on ABC tonight it dawned on me immediately that I was wearing nothing very 'Halloweenie.' So I came up (thump) with a pair of size 12 orange cotton (JMS) panties. These pants have been around for a long time now and the elastic in the leg openings has lost flexibility, leaving me with a case of 'knickers that don't knick.' Oh well, it's my secret.
Speaking of (tap) 'Weenies,' I saw on 'Millionaire' today that 'Consumer Reports recommends Hebrew National brand as the best hot dogs.' Unable to believe that I looked it up. Sure enough!
ABC News had a few interesting Halloween tidbits tonight:
----------
Head stab
MRSA
Adult Halloween Dress
----------
The Head stab piece was about some guy who got stabbed in the head and lost some sensation in his face as a result. This clicked with my awareness of the Judeo/Muslim practice of infant circumcision which stabs you in the 'other head' and removes sensation from your future sex life. Supposed to be very pleasing to god, the practice is widespread, especially in America. The vast majority of the world's males remain uncircumcised, and this fact no doubt irritates god constantly as he attends to each and every case of male masturbation personally, the ultimate witness to a grievous sin, punishable in Hell.
Then there is MRSA, a staph infection which has evolved to resist modern antibiotics. This problem can be by-passed with older cures (for example, Isodine) which you apply to the infection site immediately upon noticing redness following a skin break. Isodine also works well against adult diaper rash (eheh) but if you find yourself resorting often to Isodine in the absense of a bladder control problem you may be well advised to consult the services of a sex counselor. Avoid psychiatrists: they don't know doggie-doo. Really.
Bringing us to my Halloween Dress. Seeing the piece on ABC tonight it dawned on me immediately that I was wearing nothing very 'Halloweenie.' So I came up (thump) with a pair of size 12 orange cotton (JMS) panties. These pants have been around for a long time now and the elastic in the leg openings has lost flexibility, leaving me with a case of 'knickers that don't knick.' Oh well, it's my secret.
Speaking of (tap) 'Weenies,' I saw on 'Millionaire' today that 'Consumer Reports recommends Hebrew National brand as the best hot dogs.' Unable to believe that I looked it up. Sure enough!
