Friday, August 17, 2007
Calling for Help
(2)
Which brings us to the question of why I have treated the matter so indifferently. After all, some bozo climbed up onto our patio (tap) early in the morning with a pair of dikes and clipped part of the screen which supported the safety pin to which another safety pin attached to a lanyard connected to a pin in an alarm designed to warn of (boom) intruders was inserted. Clearly this was more than a simple case of random vandalism. In fact, this incident supports the claim I have been making (tap) for many years concerning personal terrorism. Indeed, this incident is the single most compelling evidence supporting my claim because it is actual physical evidence. Even Kootch was impressed. Even Kootch! Subjective evidence (tap) like frequent violent coughing (tap), frequent bizarre skin sensations like skin-crawling, pricking, and stinging, and bizarre muscle movements like fine muscle twitching and teeth chattering, are all merely subjective body actions which may or may not (tap) have any relation to 'gas' or 'electromagnetic radiation.' But the screen door evidence was actual objective evidence. Why didn't I call the ACSD immediately?
Eheh. You don't know the ACSD. I do (tap).
In order to illustrate what I mean by that last remark I am minded to cook up a series of interviews with local 'law enforcement.' I will begin with my initial call for help over the telephone:
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me: (dialing 303-795-4711)
sd: Arapahoe County Sheriff's Department. How can I help you?
me: My screen door has been vandalized.
sd: Vandalized how?
me: Somebody took a pair of dikes to it (tap) and cut a 1.5 inch channel in it.
sd: That's all?
me: yes. I would like to talk to a detective.
sd: We are very busy at the moment, and you would need to talk to an officer first. Our soonest opening is Thursday afternoon.
me: But today is Friday morning.
sd: Thursday afternoon. Take it or leave it.
me: I'll take it.
sd: Officer Kelso will be visiting you Thursday afternoon at 5:30. PM.
me: but I watch The News then.
sd: Take it or leave it.
me: I'll take it.
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Which brings us to the question of why I have treated the matter so indifferently. After all, some bozo climbed up onto our patio (tap) early in the morning with a pair of dikes and clipped part of the screen which supported the safety pin to which another safety pin attached to a lanyard connected to a pin in an alarm designed to warn of (boom) intruders was inserted. Clearly this was more than a simple case of random vandalism. In fact, this incident supports the claim I have been making (tap) for many years concerning personal terrorism. Indeed, this incident is the single most compelling evidence supporting my claim because it is actual physical evidence. Even Kootch was impressed. Even Kootch! Subjective evidence (tap) like frequent violent coughing (tap), frequent bizarre skin sensations like skin-crawling, pricking, and stinging, and bizarre muscle movements like fine muscle twitching and teeth chattering, are all merely subjective body actions which may or may not (tap) have any relation to 'gas' or 'electromagnetic radiation.' But the screen door evidence was actual objective evidence. Why didn't I call the ACSD immediately?
Eheh. You don't know the ACSD. I do (tap).
In order to illustrate what I mean by that last remark I am minded to cook up a series of interviews with local 'law enforcement.' I will begin with my initial call for help over the telephone:
----------
me: (dialing 303-795-4711)
sd: Arapahoe County Sheriff's Department. How can I help you?
me: My screen door has been vandalized.
sd: Vandalized how?
me: Somebody took a pair of dikes to it (tap) and cut a 1.5 inch channel in it.
sd: That's all?
me: yes. I would like to talk to a detective.
sd: We are very busy at the moment, and you would need to talk to an officer first. Our soonest opening is Thursday afternoon.
me: But today is Friday morning.
sd: Thursday afternoon. Take it or leave it.
me: I'll take it.
sd: Officer Kelso will be visiting you Thursday afternoon at 5:30. PM.
me: but I watch The News then.
sd: Take it or leave it.
me: I'll take it.
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