Friday, February 16, 2007
Certainty in Iraq
(4)
There are those who think that The Magic of Democracy can still take hold in Iraq. They do not understand the situation. Iraq is Northern Ireland raised to the third power. Only one thing will quell the tribal/sectarian/etc problems in Iraq: money: the rest of the world must buy Iraq. Literally. But can we afford it?
Here is what I mean: we must make this life more attractive to Iraqis than the next life. There are two ways to do that.
1. We need to bring Iraqi employment up to 90 percent or more.
2. We need to ridicule Muslim religion to the point that few Iraqis will take it seriously. And not that we need to prohibit circumcision! Not just yet. Not at all, in fact. But we need to enforce a scientific attitude in Iraqi citizens to the point that they will begin to doubt that Jewish sexual mutilation is pleasing to God. We need to make it clear to the average Iraqi citizen that circumcision equals desensitation equals sexual numbness, and that furthermore orgasm is equated with cultural stability: more orgasms, more cultural stability. We should begin an orgasm offensive in Iraq as soon as possible. That is to say that we should use our current military assets in Iraq to produce as many Iraqi orgasms as possible.
Bottom line is we need to introduce Just My Size panties to both Iraqi women and Iraqi men. You laugh.
But I am serious: economic certainty and sexual certainty are the two primary certainties. Metaphysical certainties lag far behind. Lacking the two primary certainties normal people tend to fall back on the more dubious certainties including religious certainty. We must avoid this in Iraq.
Saddam provided political certainty. That is not an option for us, or for the Iraqis nowadays. Iraqi political certainty has come and gone. Iraqis need to learn how to live in a new world of political uncertainty based on mutual respect and national awareness.
There are those who think that The Magic of Democracy can still take hold in Iraq. They do not understand the situation. Iraq is Northern Ireland raised to the third power. Only one thing will quell the tribal/sectarian/etc problems in Iraq: money: the rest of the world must buy Iraq. Literally. But can we afford it?
Here is what I mean: we must make this life more attractive to Iraqis than the next life. There are two ways to do that.
1. We need to bring Iraqi employment up to 90 percent or more.
2. We need to ridicule Muslim religion to the point that few Iraqis will take it seriously. And not that we need to prohibit circumcision! Not just yet. Not at all, in fact. But we need to enforce a scientific attitude in Iraqi citizens to the point that they will begin to doubt that Jewish sexual mutilation is pleasing to God. We need to make it clear to the average Iraqi citizen that circumcision equals desensitation equals sexual numbness, and that furthermore orgasm is equated with cultural stability: more orgasms, more cultural stability. We should begin an orgasm offensive in Iraq as soon as possible. That is to say that we should use our current military assets in Iraq to produce as many Iraqi orgasms as possible.
Bottom line is we need to introduce Just My Size panties to both Iraqi women and Iraqi men. You laugh.
But I am serious: economic certainty and sexual certainty are the two primary certainties. Metaphysical certainties lag far behind. Lacking the two primary certainties normal people tend to fall back on the more dubious certainties including religious certainty. We must avoid this in Iraq.
Saddam provided political certainty. That is not an option for us, or for the Iraqis nowadays. Iraqi political certainty has come and gone. Iraqis need to learn how to live in a new world of political uncertainty based on mutual respect and national awareness.
